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THE MODERN DRAMA SERIES 
EDITED BY EDWIN BJORKMAN 



PAPA • BY ZOE AKINS 



PAPA 



AN AMORALITY IN THREE ACTS 



BY 

ZOE AKINS 




NEW YORK 

MITCHELL KENNERLEY 

MCMXIII 



COPYRIGHT, 1913, MITCHELL KENNERLEY 



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CX^ 






©CI.A361067 





CONTENTS 


PAGE 


Introduction 


PAPA 


vii 


Papa's Jewels 




1 


Mr. Roderick's 


Magnanimity 


35 


Papa's Future 




67 



INTRODUCTION 

ZOE AKINS was born in 1886 at Humansville, a 
small town in the Ozark Mountain region of 
Missouri, but her home has been at St. Louis since she 
was eleven. On her mother's side she is a descendant 
from that Earl of Pembroke who is best known to his- 
tory as Shakespeare's friend. Her maternal grand- 
uncle was Duff Green, a Southern newspaper editor, 
whose appointment as Public Printer in 1829 was the 
first manifestation of President Jackson's new theory 
of office-holding — " to the victors belong the spoils." 
Numerous members of her mother's family have been 
engaged in literary pursuits of one kind or another. 
Her father has for many years been prominent in the 
affairs of the Republican party and is now Postmaster 
of St. Louis. She had two years of schooling at the 
Monticello Seminary, of Godfrey, 111., and two more at 
Hosmer Hall in St. Louis. But her hopes of entering 
either Radcliffe or the University of Chicago were 
foiled by serious illness. 

At seventeen, while her parents were away, she joined 
for a time the Odeon Stock Company, then playing in 
St. Louis. The one immediate satisfaction she got out 
of this step lay in the excitement it created among her 
friends. But in the end she carried off valuable lessons 
in stagecraft and a wholesome conviction that she 



viii INTRODUCTION 

would never care to become an actress. While still a 
mere child, she had been writing verse and trying her 
hands at plays, one of which was performed by her 
schoolmates at Hosmer Hall. After her experience on 
the stage, she began to write critical articles for the 
St. Louis Mirror and " specials " for the daily news- 
papers — mostly as a " means toward adventure." 
She was anxious to meet visiting celebrities, and her 
wish was frequently fulfilled. Thus, for instance, she 
became acquainted with Julia Marlowe, whose friend- 
ship and advice have exercised considerable influence 
on her subsequent progress as a writer. It was Miss 
Marlowe who made her study the great European 
dramatists and who taught her " to demand a larger 
thing of a play than the play itself." 

At seventeen she completed her first real stage play, 
" The End of the Strike." It dealt with a situation 
almost identical with the one lately existing in West 
Virginia, and she says of it that " it was no more ab- 
surd than the average play produced on Broadway." 
At nineteen she wrote a verse drama, " Iseult, the Fair," 
which was " almost produced and almost published." 
During the same year she wrote also a number of poems 
which won her increasing recognition. Since then she 
has produced the following dramatic works which have 
not yet been printed or performed: " The Voice," 1907, 
a one-act play, with the action laid in a Turkish harem 
and the principal character appearing only as a voice; 
"The Wandering Shepherd," 1907, a masque; "The 
Sin," 1909, a modern drama in four acts with heredity 
as its main theme; " The Meddler," 1909, a play about 
anarchism ; " The Learned Lady," 1910, a comedy ; 
" Clemence," 1911, a psychological study in one act. 



INTRODUCTION ix 

Her first volume of verse was published in 1912 and 
met with a great deal of approval on both sides of the 
Atlantic. Though all the poems in it possess undeni- 
able charm, the volume would, to me, seem pretty much 
like any other collection of minor poetry but for cer- 
tain significant passages in such poems as " Mary 
Magdalen," "One Woman" and "The Sisterhood." 
In these passages there is displayed an independence of 
attitude and expression that strongly suggests their 
author as one of the voices of the new womanhood. 

" Papa," the play hereby given to the public, is a 
little masterpiece that places its creator with such 
typical representatives of the genre as Arthur Schnitz- 
ler, the Dane Gustav Wied and the author of " The 
Dolly Dialogues." Like the work of these men, that 
of Miss Akins seems on the surface to be " for amuse- 
ment only," while to the penetrating mind it yields a 
social satire which, in spite of its good temper and its 
exquisite playfulness, buries its biting lash beneath the 
callous cuticle of our modem " dronedom." 

Edwin Bjorkman. 



THE FIRST ACT 
PAPA'S JEWELS 



PERSONS 

Papa 

Chloe 

Doris 

Mr. Roderick 

Dick 



PAPA 



THE FIRST ACT 

It is mid-morning of a day in June. In an upstairs 
sun-parlor-balcony of a house in New York, Doris 
and Chloe, very pretty girls, in charming white morn- 
ing frocks, are lying on two couches, reading the 
morning papers and sipping chocolate from the table 
between them, on which is a large tray laden with 
breakfast things. A third chair, empty, is also drawn 
up to the table; it is a big armchair covered with 
cretonne and, like all the furniture in the balcony, 
wrought out of ivory wicker. Now and then Chloe and 
Doris read aloud certain thrilling items to each other; 
yet their light, sweet voices are unexcited. One might 
say that there was the note of resignation in them. 

CHLOE 

The Witchmeres sailed yesterday. 

DORIS 

Francis Stillwell is with the Countess of Lawton in 
Scotland — a house party. 

CHLOE 

Her grace is coming to Newport ! . . . Heavens ! 
Can't you just see Mrs. Joe when " my daughter 
the Duchess " arrives? This is the first time Lydia 
has been home. 



4 PAPA [act I 

DORIS 

She 's asked you to England twice, Chloe. Why 
did n't you take her up ? 

CHLOE 

She did n't really want me. 

DORIS 

What difference does that make? But, of course, 
you go in for sincerity. 

CHLOE 

Would n't it be heavenly if we could go somewhere ? 

DORIS 

Then why, under heaven, don't you marry Dick? 

CHLOE 

You know the reason well. I love Dick too much. 
. . . But you pretend that you are so heartless. 
Why don't you marry Mr. Roderick? 

DORIS 

I don't even like him well enough. ... Of course 
I 'm not soft like you — and looking for grand 
passions — and getting unreasonable and touch}^ 
when I think I 've got one. I 'd be content with any 
nice man if I really liked him. But see here, Chloe, 
you 're three years older, and it 's up to you to 
marry first. I will not go to live in a house with 
any human being whom I don't really like. (Pauses^ 
and then continues) I 'd be utterly miserable if I 
could n't like my husband as well — as — as — my 
butler, for instance. 

CHLOE 

There 's nothing against Mr. Roderick. 

DORIS 

No — no. But he is n't very convincing, and he 
has n't any magnetism. Is he so good? So kind — 



ACT i] PAPA 5 

really? Or does he only follow the line of least 
resistance? He looks as weak as a Bronx cocktail 
— and any sort of weakness gets on my nerves. 
He '11 have to come across with something more 
noble than supporting Grand Opera and a Home for 
Fallen Ladies before I '11 take him. 

CHLOE 

Papa likes him so well — poor Papa ! 

DORIS 

It is very unkind of you to reproach me with Papa, 
Chloe. 

[Papa enters — a dainty gallant, fragile and ex- 
quisite at the age of sixty-five. He is no less 
exquisitely dressed. His manners rival in grace and 
correctness those of a dancing master, 

PAPA 

Good morning, daughters. 

l^Both rise and flutter to him. It is plain that they 
idolize him, and that he is devoted to them. 
DORIS AND CHLOE {together) 

Good morning, darling ! Good morning, dearest ! 
[They kiss him and he hisses them. They bring him 
to the empty chair at the table. 

DORIS 

Here is chocolate, dear. 

CHLOE 

You 'd rather have tea, darling, I know. 

DORIS 

Put the toast in the toaster, Chloe. Is the marma- 
lade there? 

CHLOE 

Here 's your orange juice, first, dear. 



6 PAPA [act I 

DORIS 

Chocolate is more nourishing than tea, dear. 

CHLOE 

But you do want tea, don't you, dear? 

PAPA 

Yes, darling, tea. . . . I 'm too old to change. . . • 

I 'm too old now for — 

\_Both stop him with little cries. 

CHLOE 

Old ! You 're fishing, dear ! You don't look forty ! 

DORIS 

Not thirty-five ! A man is only as old as he feels — 
and you feel as young as we do. 

CHLOE 

See how fresh and well you look this morning, dear. 
^She hands him a delicate little mirror which she 
wears on a chain about her neck. 
PAPA (examining himself) 

Ah, I '11 never get used to these gray hairs, my dears. 

DORIS 

And we caused them, mostly. You 're quite a young 
man, dear. You must have them touched up again. 

CHLOE 

I got some rouge for you yesterday, darling. It 
stays on — and simply can't be told. 
PAPA (the languor goes out of his voice; he is inter- 
ested) Liquid or dry.? 

CHLOE 

Liquid ; it is called " Pomegranate Glow." It 's 
wonderful. 

PAPA 

Have Marston bring it to my room before I dress 
for the afternoon. 



ACT i] PAPA 7 

CHLOE 

Here 's the tea, dear — with four lumps and oceans 
of cream. 

DORIS 

And the toast and the marmalade — on this nice 
little plate. 

CHLOE 

Did you sleep well, dear? 

PAPA 

Thank you, darling, no. ... I never sleep any 
more. 
CHLOE AND DORIS {together) 
Oh, poor papa! 

[The telephone rings. Chloe takes it from the 
lower part of the table and answers, 

CHLOE 

Hello! This is his residence. He is just awake and 
having his breakfast. Can I take the message.'' 
Wait a minute. (To Papa) It 's Mr. Deering. 

PAPA 

Give it to me. I '11 talk to him, darling. (^She hands 
the telephone to him; his manner changes to hauteur) 
Yes, Deering. Put them off. To-day? I '11 make 
some arrangements. I 'm at breakfast now. Call 
me in an hour. {Puts the telephone down; stares 
blankly ahead in silence) 

CHLOE 

What is it? Any worries? 

PAPA 

Deering is a nuisance. He 's — he 's not diplomatic. 
Somebody wants to be paid for something — and 
I 've got to get fifty thousand dollars together at 
once. He says it can't be put off any longer. I 



8 PAPA [act I 



might be indicted — or something. . . . Why, this 
is humiliating! Humiliating! 
DORIS (with an inspiration) 
Why don't you use — 

CHLOE 

Our money? 

PAPA 

I 've used Chloe's. I can't touch Doris' until she 's 
twenty-one. It is in trust until then. 

DOEIS 

How disagreeable! How unkind of grandfather to 
fix mama's money like that. Never mind — you 
shall have it in a year, darling. 

PAPA 

I won't live a year if this keeps up. (Wipes his 
eyes) I 'm being persecuted. I can't stand un- 
pleasantness. 
DORIS AND CHLOE (impressively to each other, as with 
one thought) we must get married ! 
[Having spoken at the same time both hold up little 
fingers and formally join them in the rites of wishing. 

DORIS 

Shakespeare. 

CHLOE 

Milton. 

DORIS 

Pins. 

CHLOE 

Needles. 

\_The rites have been performed. Their hands fall 

apart, 

DORIS 

Now! 



ACT i] PAPA 9 

CHLOE 

If my wish comes true — 
PAPA (hopefully) 

Oh, my darling daughters ! I 'm a great trouble to 
you! 

CHLOE 

Nonsense — 

DORIS 

You 're the dearest, wisest — 

CHLOE 

Best, sweetest — 

DORIS 

Noblest — 

CHLOE 

Most wonderful — 

DORIS 

Man in the whole world. 

CHLOE 

You really are. Papa! And it is our duty to get 
married right off. That would help the debts, 
would n't it ? 

PAPA 

With either Mr. Roderick or Dick as a son-in-law, I 
could manage very well. With a little tact I could 
borrow anything from anybody then. 
DORIS {energetically) 

We '11 have to draw straws, Chloe, to see which one 
marries. 

PAPA 

My noble girls ! 

[Chloe suddenly begins to weep. 



10 PAPA [act I 

PAPA {to Chloe) 

Dear, darling, child ! I know what is in your mind — 
but for my sake you must not think of it. 

CHIiOE 

My poor baby! 

DORIS 

You must have been a ninny — a sentimental ninny 
— and I think your baby is a good deal better off 
without you. 

PAPA 

The child receives the best of attention, and the gov- 
erness speaks excellent French — I have seen to that. 
But my lovely Chloe is too good, too saintly, too 
tender-hearted. She loves her child. 

CHLOE 

It is n't that. I love Dick — and I must deceive 
him if I marry him, and that means that I shall never 
get my baby back again. I 'm wronging the man I 
love — and my own, child ! Oh, why was I ever 
born? Oh, why did I go with that hateful man to 
supper — alone? 

PAPA 

There — there — my darling ! It was only your 
lovely innocence that led you astray. It was only 
an indiscretion. 

CHI.OE 

But I ought not to have gone to his rooms unchaper- 
oned. I knew it was n't exactly — conventional, 

DORIS 

That 's what I say — why did you do it? 

CHLOE 

He was so fascinating! 



ACT l] PAPA 11 

PAPA 

And a very great tenor! 

CHLOE 

And I thought I loved him ! 

DORIS 

Well, after you saw what was going to happen, why 
didn't you marry him. It is always done, is n't it? 

PAPA 

My daughter marry an opera-singer ! I should not 
have allowed it. 

CHLOE 

Yes — I couldn't marry him, could I? Besides he 
had an obscure wife somewhere in Italy. 

DORIS 

Well, I 'm sorry for you. But since it was n't my 
fault, you 've got to be a sport and draw straws 
with me — or we '11 toss a coin. Got one, dear? 
PAPA (^searching) 

Ah — er — yes ! It 's only a penny, darling — 

DORIS 

Don't apologize. It '11 do quite well. 
CHLOE {with her head resting on her hands, staring into 
space) My little Dolores will be four years old next 
Thursday ! 

DORIS 

Come — come — don't moon. Heads, me ; tails, 
you. {To Papa) Flip it, dear. Once. 
PAPA {enjoying this part of it and rising for the cere- 
mony) I hope that my .darling daughters know how 
to either win or lose with perfect grace. Ready? 
[He flips the coin. All watch it. Doris draws a 
long breath of relief. Chloe and Papa fall into each 
other'' s arms. 



12 PAPA [act I 

PAPA 

My saintly Chloe! 

DORIS 

I 'm sorry, Chloe — but come, buck up ! We '11 put 
it over, some way or other. 

CHLOE 

He must never know! Dick is so spoiled, and so 
conventional about all the little things. He 'd never 
forgive me. He — he hates music anyway ! 

PAPA 

He won't know, my darling. Nobody knows. They 
think — down there — that it is your little half- 
sister. (^Papa blushes as he speaks) 

CHLOE 

That 's just like you! To sacrifice your reputation 
for me! ... I can do no less than sacrifice every- 
thing for you. 
[A hell is heard. 

DORIS 

Mr. Roderick ! I forgot ! He said he 'd be here at 
eleven. You 're a sight, Chloe ! Run on up and weep 
it all out now before you see Dick. You 'd better 
send him around a note. 

CHLOE 

No, I '11 telephone. 

DORIS 

Say Papa objects, and you must elope. Papa needs 
the money to-day — remember. 
CHLOE (desperately) 

What do I care what else I say to him? 

DORIS 

Go on ; don't feel such a martyr. You '11 have all 



ACT i] PAPA 13 

that money — and some more babies if you really 
want them — and then you can start things and put 
it over Mrs. Joe and all the rest of them. It won't 
be bad. 

CHLOE 

I am going to do what is best for Papa's sake alone, 

PAPA 

My love ! Be brave ! 

[They embrace. Chloe goes out tearfully. Papa 
and Doris stand touched and genumely moved — 
looking at each other for a long second in silence, 
Chloe suddenly reappears, a more cheerful note in 
her voice, 

CHLOE 

Doris, would you wear that new green frock and the 
gray motor coat? Or that white serge with ray little 
blue hat — and a dark blue coat ? It would be rather 
smart for an elopement, don't you think? 
[The family spirits rise. 

DORIS 

Oh, the white and blue ! You can stand those simple, 
severe things. 

CHLOE 

Dick likes it, too. 

PAPA 

My daughter must have a bouquet! Just a casual 
little bouquet of pure white lilies. I '11 go for them 
myself! Ah, if we could only have a real wedding! 
I love weddings ! 

CHLOE 

Thanks, darling, but Dick will be here the minute 



14 PAPA [act I 

after I call him, so we must hurry. (^She runs out, 
quite pleased with herself) 
DORIS (embracing Papa joyously) 

Oh Papa ! Papa darling ! I don't have to marry old 
Mr. Roderick, do I? Oh, I'm so happy, dear! I 
don't want to marry anyone yet! 
[Mr. Roderick appears in the doorway. He wears a 
golden Van Dyke heard and an air of great patience. 
He is dressed with wonderful precision and is accom- 
panied by a spic-and-span white English Bull. Mr. 
Roderick is quite as fine a gentleman in his way as 
the English Bull in his. There is, in fact, a delicate 
resemblance between them, 

MR. RODERICK 

May I come in? 

DORIS 

Oh, good morning, Mr. Roderick. (She pays great 
attention to the dog while Papa and Mr. Roderick 
address one another) Shake hands, Tommy. 
\_The dog gives her a paw, 

PAPA 

Good morning, good morning. Come right in. 

MR. RODERICK 

Your man put me in the library and went to find 
Miss Doris. But I thought I heard voices and came 
to hunt her myself. 

PAPA 

Quite right. The girls and I have our breakfast 
out here these hot mornings. But if you '11 excuse 
me, I must leave you for a few minutes — I 've an 
errand at the florist's. I want flowers sent to the 
funeral of a poor, dear, old lady I used to know, 
and I wish to select them myself. 



ACT i] PAPA 15 

MR. RODERICK 

Quite thoughtful of you. My car is at the door. 
Let my man take you. 

PAPA 

Thank you. I will. {He notices the dog and pats 
him on the head) Ah, Tommy ! He 's a very hand- 
some animal, Mr. Roderick. 
MR. RODERICK {beaming with pleasure) 

Say " Thank you," Tommy. Shake hands. 

[The dog is put through his paces and gives his paw 

to Papa, who then turns to Mr. Roderick. 

PAPA 

We 'd like to keep you for luncheon, Mr. Roderick. 
We might have some bridge. 

MR. RODERICK 

Thank you. Perhaps. 
PAPA {hisses Doris^ hand) 
Au revoir, my darling. 

DORIS 

Au revoir, dear. 

\^Papa leaves the room with rare grace. 

MR. RODERICK 

What wonderful charm your father has ! It is a 
pleasure to see him with his daughters. 

DORIS 

He is the noblest man in the world! 

MR. RODERICK 

And you are a noble daughter. . . . Come, are you 
going to keep me waiting. . . , You were to tell me 
something to-day. 

DORIS 

Just — what ? 



16 PAPA [act I 

MR. RODERICK 

Have jou — forgotten? 

DORIS 

Oh — 

MR. RODERICK 

Do you — will you — can't you ? 

DORIS 

Dear Mr. Roderick, I wish I could. But I don't 
know you well enough. You don't know me well 
enough. I 'm afraid I must tell you — no. 

MR. RODERICK 

Give me some hope. In time, perhaps . . . and I 
know your dear transparent nature perfectly — 
perfectly. 

DORIS 

Not now — or any time. I 'm afraid I must n't let 
you get a false impression. No, it can never be. 

MR. RODERICK 

Why not? Give me a reason. 
DORIS (with a gleam of amusement in her eyes as she 

turns slightly from him) I am too kind to give you 

the real reason. 
MR. RODERICK (interested) 

I will take it without flinching — and be grateful ! 
DORIS (toying with the situation) 

No matter how I might hurt you — or disappoint 

you? 

MR. RODERICK 

No matter. Give me a single reason for your refusal, 
and if it is valid — or if it explains my failure — I 
shall persist no further in forcing my love upon you. 
But I shall remain until the end — at your service 
— ready at all times to make any sacrifice for your 



ACT i] PAPA 17 

pleasure or comfort, to be a loyal friend to you and 
your dear ones, to feel a request from you an in- 
comparable honor! 
DORIS {her eyes growing big with pleasure) 
How simply beautiful of you! 

MR. RODERICK 

Then do not hesitate. Tell me your real reason, 
\_Doris looks away lost and confused, as if searching 
for a reason worthy of his attitude. Suddenly an 
inspiration comes into her eyes. She is overjoyed 
and begins to act her part with zest, 

DORIS 

You may loathe and despise me, but at least I shall 
do as you ask. What I am about to tell you will 
put your promise to a severe test. 
[Mr. Roderick plays up to her. He rises, facing her, 
and they do their scene in a fine heroic style, 

MR. RODERICK 

Go on. 

DORIS 

I am not exactly what I seem to you — a young 
girl — innocent and lovely — {She falters') 

MR. RODERICK 

Go on. 

DORIS 

I have had my irresponsible and mad moments — 
moments that break and destroy — though they are 
so brief — and so careless — {She falters again) 

MR. RODERICK 

Go on. 

DORIS 

I — I — have had no mother — since I was — a 
very little child. 



18 PAPA [act I 

MR. RODERICK (gently) 
I know — go on. 

DORIS 

I was innocent and foolish — 

MR. RODERICK 

Go on. 

DORIS 

In fact it was my very innocence that led me astray. 

MR. RODERICK 

Go on — 

DORIS 

But you must not judge too gently. I kn^w that to 
go to his rooms, alone, to supper — was not exactly 

— conventional, 

MR. RODERICK " ' 

Go on — 

DORIS 

But I went — 

MR. RODERICK 

Go on — 

DORIS 

I can't — I — I — I thought I loved him — {She 
falters) 
MR. RODERICK (womed and hesitant) 

Well, why did n't you — if he got you compromised 

— or talked about — why — why did n't he marry 
you.? 

DORIS 

He — he had an obscure wife in Spain — no, in 
Italy. 

MR. RODERICK 

Am I to understand.'' Great God! Who was this 
man? 



ACT i] PAPA 19 

DORIS 

A very great tenor. All the girls were wild about 
him. Besides, Papa would not have permitted me to 
marry an opera singer. We have been so carefully 
brought up. 

MR. RODERICK 

But — Great God! And he — he? Goon. 
DORIS (^dropping her face mto her hands, and staring 

into space) My little Dolores will be four years old 

next Thursday. 
MR. RODERICK ( tramps up and down) 

So? Can this thing he? A child! Dolores! Four! 

How old are you? {^He stops facing her) 

DORIS 

Twenty. 
MR. RODERICK {heroically) 

Great God ! This is infamous ! Your father — 
knew ? 

DORIS 

Oh yes ! He was so splendid ! They think it his — 
the people who have it. He means to keep me with 
him, always — I 've suffered so much. But I 
could n't deceive you — I shall never marry. 

MR. RODERICK 

But my dear, darling, wounded girl ! I 've only pity 
for you! Can't you understand that? I love you 
as much — no, more than ever ! Come, rest your 
head on my shoulder. Of course I '11 marry you ! 
Noble Doris ! 

[Doris comes to the earth at this — gasps for breath 
— falls head over heels in love on the instant — and 
into his arms with a queer uncertain little sound. 



20 PAPA [act I 

DORIS 

Oh— Urn! 

l^She cannot manage to say a word. He embraces 
her and talks as if to a child, with indignant tender- 
ness. She is entirely subdued, 

MR. RODERICK 

And you shall have your little Dolores back. Of 
course, you want her. We shall adopt her legally. 
It can be done quite simply. 
{^Doris fidgets, 

MR. RODERICK 

You shall never be annoyed or mistreated or humili- 
ated or hurt again. You shall have beautiful houses 
to live in — wherever you want them — and beauti- 
ful j ewels — and gowns — and your dear father 
shall come to live with us — and your sister too — 
my darling angel ! . . . Could n't you marry me 
to-day, right now.? 

\_Dick appears at the door. He is handsome, young, 
healthy — in motor things of superlative fastidious- 
ness. 

DICK 

Hello! Where's Chloe? 

[Mr. Roderick and Doris fall apart. 

MR. RODERICK 

Ah, come right in, Dick — 

\_There is a secret in the air. Dick senses it. 

DICK 

I say, what 's going on.^^ 

MR. RODERICK 

We '11 take you into our confidence. Doris has 
promised to marry me, and we 're going — going — 



ACT i] PAPA 21 

across the river. It is hard on her dear father 
— but he 'd never let me have her if I did n't steal 
her — and all 's fair in love, you know. We '11 
make it up to him afterwards. 

DICK 

I say — this is bully ! This is fine ! 

DORIS 

What.? Why.? 

DICK 

Why, Chloe has said " yes," at last. . . . We 're 
eloping ! 

{^Dick and Mr. Roderick seize each other'' s hands 
and shake in congratulation and joy. 

MR. RODERICK 

Fine! It's a foursome. . . . But — (Vaguely) 
Are n't there licenses — and rings — and things .? 
Doris' father has my machine. 

DICK 

I 've a touring car at the door. I 'm onto all the 
ropes. It will take Doris fifteen minutes to put on a 
hat, I suppose, so we might run down the avenue for 
a couple of rings. 

MR. RODERICK {embracing Doris) 

We won't be gone a minute, darling. Be ready when 

we come back, will you? 
DORIS (a propos of nothing) 

Poor Papa! 

\_All are silent. 

MR. RODERICK 

I do feel as if we were treating him rather shabbily. 
{He pauses) 



22 PAPA [act I 

DICK 

I 've got it. Write a note saying we 're all getting 
married and leaving for Europe this evening. Ask 
him to forgive us and come along. 

MR. RODERICK 

Of course ! The very thing ! 
DORIS (to Mr. Roderick) 
You want him.f^ 

MR. RODERICK 

Of course. 
DORIS (she begins to get her hearings again) 

Oh, you 're the noblest man in the world — except 

Papa ! 

[Mr. Roderick embraces her, 

DICK 

Now we 're running along. Write that note — and 
have Chloe ready when we get back. 

DORIS 

Yes, yes, yes. 

\^She sits at a little desk at one side of the room; 

Mr. Roderick kisses her good-bye, and dilly-dally s 

over her chair. 
DORIS (to Mr. Roderick) 

You won't ever be sorry .f' I may be much worse 

than you think me. 
MR. RODERICK (in a low, intimate voice) 

Nonsense. Your soul is perfectly clear to me. I 

love you all the more for having suffered. I under- 
stand perfectly. 

[Doris fidgets. 

DICK 

Come on, come on! 



ACT i] PAPA 23 

DORIS {sending Mr, Roderick away) 

Go — 

[il/r. Roderick and Dick start to leave; Doris 

writes; all three murmur at the same time, 
DORIS (writing) 

Dear darling angel Papa — 

DICK 

The best place in . . . shortest way — 

MR. RODERICK 

. . . Extra tires . . . such lovely girls . . . Tom- 
my, Tommy. . . . 

[They go out, followed hy the English Bull. Doris 
writes for a moment. Chloe enters looking very 
fetching. She carries her dark coat, 

CHLOE 

I saw Dick leave with Mr. Roderick — why.'' 
[Doris writes on, folds up her note and kisses it 
violently before she answers. 
CHLOE (repeats her question) 
Why, Doris.'' 

DORIS 

There! {Bounces up) Oh Chloe! I'm in love — 
really in love — with Mr. Roderick ! He is n't weak 
— and he is good and he has magnetism — and I 
not only like him ! I love him ! 

CHLOE 

But Dick.? 

DORIS 

They 've gone for the rings — 

[Papa enters with two bouquets, one of yellow roses, 

and one of pink roses. 



24 PAPA [act I 

PAPA 

Dick hasn't come, has he? I'm in time! {He 
kisses each dmighter and presents the bouquets 
elegantly) I could n't bring white flowers — they 
remind me of funerals. But here are yellow roses 
for the bride — for I 'm jealous already; and pink 
roses for my Doris — who is rosier than any rose. 
DORIS AND CHLOE (^charmed) 
Oh, thank you, Papa, dear! 
[Both kiss him. 

DORIS 

But here 's news for you — news ! ( Waves the letter 
she has just written) You must n't read it yet. 
It 's a secret. Promise not to read it until you 
ought. 

PAPA 

I promise — on my honor ! 

DORIS 

Then I shall tell you what is in it. I 'm in love 
with Mr. Roderick. He 's really a very fine, noble 
man, dear — next to you. 

CHLOE 

For heaven's sake get to the point, Doris ! 

DORIS 

Well, it all came about so beautifully that I 've 
promised to marry him. He 's gone for a ring, and 
we 're eloping! I could n't say a word. . . . You 've 
no idea how real love puts you in your place. 

CHLOE 

You ! But / *m eloping. Dick said he 'd be right 
over. 

DORIS 

We 're all eloping. Mr. Roderick told Dick, and 



ACT i] PAPA 25 

they shook hands and went for two rings while I 
was writing this note to jou, Papa, and getting a 
hat on. They think they 're treating you badly, the 
silly dears. And this is to ask you to forgive us 
all and to sail with us for Europe to-night. Does 
that fix your debts, dear? 

PAPA 

Perfectly ! My darlings ! My treasures ! You have 
saved my life and my honor ! 

DORIS 

And oh. Papa; you must be very angry, and pre- 
tend to be quite put out! 

PAPA 

I could n't embarrass my daughters ! I shall not 
relent until Chloe has wept. I hope we go to Paris 
first! Let us linger in Paris, my treasures. I love 
Paris. The shops! The ladies! 

DORIS 

Don't be naughty. Papa. 
CHLOE (who has been thmking) 

Then there 's no longer any driving need of my 
marrying Dick. 

DORIS 

Now don't get that into your head ! You know per- 
fectly well, Chloe, that you lost when we flipped a 
coin. My marriage is only a happy incident. 

CHLOE 

But I 'd be happier if Dick knew. I 'd be happier 
even if I lost him, and he might forgive me — and 
let me have my little Dolores back some time. 

DORIS 

For heaven's sake ! Don't do that, Chloe ! You 
must n't ! You really must n't ! 



26 PAPA [act I 

CHLOE 

Why not? I can afford to risk it, now that Papa 
will be saved anyway. You don't know what it is to 
deceive the man you love. You have nothing to hide. 

DORIS 

Oh ! Oh ! But I do. I 'm deceiving Mr. Roderick 
too — but I 'm putting it over. 

PAPA 

Men are only too happy to be deceived by lovely 
ladies. It is an honor and a privilege. 

DORIS 

But I 'm deceiving him — awfully. . . . He asked 
for a reason ... I was too nice to say that I did n't 
seem able to enthuse about him ... I wanted a 
good reason ... so I said it was Dolores . . . and 
he forgave me so nobly that I loved him at once! 

CHIiOE 

How perfectly unscrupulous of you! That is sheer 
plagiarism, Doris ! You 've plagiarized my romance 
. . . and my child! 

DORIS 

But I don't care about your romance! Thank 
heavens, I don't have to have that crazy Italian 
tenor on my conscience, and it 's humiliating enough 
to have Mr. Roderick ever think I was such a fool. 
But he 'd never forgive me now, if he found out that 
I was n't, and had n't suffered, and all that — and 
you 're distinctly selfish to make a fuss about it. 

CHLOE 

But my little Dolores! 

DORIS 

I don't want your little Dolores. ... I just put her 
in accidentally, and now Mr. Roderick insists upon 



ACT i] PAPA 27 

adopting her — so you 've got to be a sport and lend 
her to me. 
PAPA (to CMoe, who bursts into tears) 

Dolores will be all in the family, dearest. Now don't 
cry ! You 're too tender-hearted. But you can have 
her visit you every day. Indeed, Fate has arranged 
things very wisely, my darling. I daresay that / 
you '11 see more of your child than most of our 
friends see of theirs. 

DORIS 

And anyway, Dick absolutely would not stand for 
her — or for you, either — if you told. Then Mr. 
Roderick will be simply an ideal father — much 
better than Dick. 

PAPA 

Doris is right. For my sake let us all be happy. 
The whole matter seems to be most satisfactorily 
arranged. 

CHLOE 

For your sake, darling papa. 

PAPA 

Now I shall be able to really enjoy my grandchild. 
After all, Dolores is my grandchild, either way. 
\_All smile brightly. 
CHLOE AND DORIS («5 if realizing this for the first time) 
Why, of course ! That 's true ! 

DORIS 

Though it seems quite wicked to think of you as a 
grandfather, dear. 
PAPA {he closes the argument and turns to a safer sub- 
ject of conversation) Thank you, darling. And 
they '11 be here soon, did you say, dear.'' 



28 PAPA [act I 

DORIS 

Yes, any time. I must get ready this instant. Oh, 
Papa, he is so noble, and I 'm deceiving him so basely 
— I 'm not worthy ! 
\^She falls into Papa's arms, Chloe does the same, 

CHLOE 

Nor I ! I 'm deceiving him. 

[Papa holds them both tenderly, a head on each of 
his shoulders. Both weep — Doris almost angrily, 
as if she did n't know how; Chloe more copiously and 
gracefully. Papa's voice is quite weepy too. 

PAPA 

There — there — don't cry ! A sense of honor often 
makes life very difficult, my angel. 
[A hell rings, 
Doms {pulling herself together and rising energetically 
to the occasion) There they are! Give me tlJe 
letter. Marston will be told to give it to you. . . . 
Oh , , , he is wonderful, Papa, and I — I never 
thought / could feel — like this ! It is very con- 
fusing. There 's a terrible pain right here ; yet I 'm 
glad. 

[There is a new sincerity and softness in her voice 
as she lays her hand on her heart. Chloe and Papa 
look at her in silence. She goes out loftily. Papa 
and Chloe are impressed as if hy something they 
cannot fathom. There is a silent pause. Doris ap- 
pears again in the doorway in a much more usual 
frame of mind. 

DORIS 

What would you wear, Chloe? Don't you think my 
white wool coat and my big white hat will be rather 
good? I won't have time to change anyway. I '11 



ACT i] PAPA 29 

wear a blue veil, and Papa's dear pink roses. Quite 
French, don't you think? 

CHLOE 

Yes, you can do those fluffy things. 
Doms {waving her hand) 
I '11 be down in a second. 

[She goes out. Papa and Chloe are sensible of a 
more comfortable atmosphere. Papa speaks cheer- 
fully, 

PAPA 

Could you get me Mr. Ingraham on the telephone, 
dear? I must arrange for my loan at once. 

CHLOE 

Certainly, dear. It's Broad 883, isn't it? 

[She sits down at the table and lifts up the telephone 

receiver, Dick appears in the doorway, 

DICK 

May I come in? Hello, Chloe! {To Papa) Good 
morning, how are you? 

PAPA 

Good morning, Dick; good morning. {To Chloe) 
Don't bother about my number, dearest, I '11 call 
from the library. May we keep you for luncheon, 
Dick? 

DICK 

We 're just off for a ride — if Chloe has n't changed 
her mind. 

PAPA 

Perhaps we may expect you back? Luncheon is at 
two. You 're very welcome. 

DICK 

Perhaps. . . . 



30 PAPA [act I 

PAPA 

You '11 pardon me just a minute? {He goes out) 

DICK 

Your father 's a charming fellow, Chloe. 

CHLOE 

He 's the noblest man in the world — and you 're — 

DICK 

I 'm what? 

CHLOE 

Next. 
DICK (half reproachfullz/) 

So you 've decided that at last? 

CHLOE 

I 've thought it a long time. 
DICK (takes her in his arms) i 

And my Chloe is the most beautiful, the tenderest, 
sweetest, most spiritual, most sincere woman in the 
world ! 
[He kisses her. Mr, Roderick enters, beaming. 

MR. RODERICK 

Hello! Where's Doris? 

CHLOE 

She '11 be here in a minute, Mr. Roderick. (^Gives 
him her hand) 

MR. RODERICK 

So we 're all ready for our eventful ride? We must 
wish each other much happiness. (^He takes Chloe's 
hand and holds it warmly) 

CHLOE 

Oh — oh, we do, don't we? 
PAPA (^enters) 

I 'm trying to engage Dick to come back with Chloe 
for luncheon, Mr. Roderick. You are stopping? 



ACT i] PAPA 31 

MR. RODERICK (lying with difficulty) 

The truth is — we — your other daughter and I 
are going with them. 

PAPA 

Don't let me disarrange your plans. I shall drop 
in at the club. I 'm never able to enjoy my luncheon 
if I 'm alone. 

DICK 

Why don't you join us — at — at — at Sherry's, 
say — at — at two is all right, is n't it? 
MR. RODERICK AND CHLOE (^simultaneously) 
Oh yes, do ! Do, Papa ! 

PAPA 

I am delighted. 

\_Doris enters, looking charming and picturesque in 

white, with the blue veil and pink flowers. 

DORIS 

I see I 'm keeping everyone waiting. Ready ? 
PAPA (m his most charming manner) 

I hope that the ride will be pleasant — that the sun 
will not be too hot — nor the roads too dusty — and 
that your motor will be in its most amiable mood. 
\_All, rather like children, get ready to go, and speak 
at once. 

MR. RODERICK AND DICK 

Thank you! Thanks! 

DORIS AND CHLOE 

Good-bye, dear! Good-bye, darling! 

MR. RODERICK 

Sherry's at two ! 

DICK 

Don't fail us ! 

[^Papa holds Chloe's coat and kisses first Chloe, then 



32 PAPA [act I 

Doris, very delicately; then he takes a hand of each 
in each of his hands. 
PAPA {to Mr. Roderick and Dick) 

Sherry's at two. {He kisses his daughters^ hands in 
turn, homing over them) Au 'voir, my dears ! 
[All go out. Each of the four a little shyly, as if 
occupied with some weight of guilt — not, however, a 
wholly uncomfortable weight. Papa alone is bland 
and blithe and uns elf conscious, as if unaware that 
things of importance are happening. He stands 
smiling near a windozv, waving his hand as he sees 
them leave. Then he goes to the telephone, suddenly 
becoming tense and nervous. Once his conversation 
begins, though, he gets vnvolved in the emotions he 
pretends. 

PAPA 

Broad 883. — Hello ; Mr. Ingraham. . . . Yes, yes, 
I called a minute ago. . . . Ingraham? Yes, I just 
called again about that loan. Let it go, Ingraham. 
I won't have time to call in my securities and take 
the matter up to-day. . . . It is very inconvenient, 
but I '11 have to cable later. . . . Yes, I 'm leaving 
to-night; yes, quite suddenly — in a great rush. 
. . . Well, yes ; it is something rather serious. . . . 
My daughters — I 've loved them and tried to be a 
good father, Ingraham. . . . Thank you . . . they 
— they 've both eloped. . . . Eloped, without a 
word to me, both of them. . . . And you know my 
dislike of sensationalism. . . . Yes, Dick. . . . Oh 
yes, a good marriage, as far as money goes . . . 
and my little Doris, . . . yes, Mr. Roderick. . . . 
Well, I suppose so, but I wanted my daughters to 
stay with me awhile. . . . Yes, I 'm sailing with them 



ACT i] PAPA 33 

this evening. . . . That is why I have to let my own 
business go. . . . They left a note. ... Of course, 
I shall forgive them, and then sail with them as they 
ask. I 'm a forgiving man, but I 'm hurt, Ingraham ; 
hurt. . . . Well, if you want to transfer that sum 
to my account without the securities. ... Of course 
it is only a formality, and I can send you down 
my note. . . . Thank you, Ingraham. . . . Yes, the 
Phillips Trust handle my account — or my man Deer- 
ing will call. . . . Make out the check to him, John 
E. That will be quite simple. No, that 's all for 
the present, but I may cable some orders. . . . Thank 
you very much. You 've obliged me considerably. 
... I suppose most fathers mould feel that way, but 
I 'm deeply hurt. ... Thank you. ... I hope you 
continue well, and you must present my compliments 
to Mrs. Ingraham. . . . Good-bye, good-bye. {He 
puts the telephone down. His mood instantly re- 
laxes, and he is pleased with himself and the world. 
On the table is a box of cigarettes. He takes one 
and lights it delicately, saying to himself) Chloe's.^^ 
{He takes a few puffs; and makes a discovery) Ah 
no; Doris'. . . . {He starts to pick up the news- 
paper. A handkerchief falls to the floor. He lifts 
it and regards it tenderly) Doris'. f* {He holds it 
up to catch the perfume, smelling it daintily) No, 
Chloe's. {He lifts it to his lips and kisses it. His 
face beams with love) My jewels! {He slips the 
handkerchief into his cuff as , . , the curtain falls) 

CURTAIN 



THE SECOND ACT 
MR. RODERICK'S MAGNANIMITY 



PERSONS 

Doris 

Chloe 

Papa 

Mr. Roderick 

Dick 

ZiMZAPANZI 

Little Dolores 
The Butler 
The Governess 



THE SECOND ACT 

A little more than a year has elapsed. It is almost 
time for tea when the rise of the curtain discloses the 
sitting-room of Mr, Roderick's villa near Trowville, 
The room is charming, and the furnishings are accord- 
ing to the best French taste. French windows at the 
hack, slightly ajar, open onto a terrace overlooking the 
hay. Curtained doorways are on opposite sides of the 
room. Doris and Chloe are writing, their chairs are 
across from each other at the same table, and their 
pens drink from the same well. Chloe writes in her 
diary, Doris finishes a letter and addresses it, 

DORIS 

There ! 
CHLOE {looking up) 

How much enterprise it takes to get a letter off ! 

DORIS 

You 're a lazy thing, Chloe. 
CHLOE {sweetly) 

Yes, I know I am. I have n't your energy. 

DORIS 

And I would n't have yours when it comes to writing 
oneself down in a diary — the way you do. {She 
goes hehind Chloe' s chair and reads) " I am utterly 
happy, and my soul is as peaceful as yonder sea. 
A year of constant companionship has only made 
our love more perfect. As I write, the dawn throws 



38 PAPA [act II 

its golden glory o'er hills and bay, and there is 
dawn in my heart ! " Fine ! Go on with it ! If 
you can touch up the dawn like that at this time 
of day, you '11 be turning into a lady-author yet. 
CHLOE (sarcastically) 

How polite of you! To look over my shoulder and 
read my secret thoughts ! 

DORIS 

It 's very bourgeois to be so well-bred, Chloe. Any- 
way, your secret thoughts are so nice and romantic. 
I '11 wager that if you talked in your sleep you 'd be 
as discreet as if you were talking to a reporter. 
CHiiOE (suddenly intense) 

Don't mention talking in one's sleep, Doris ! Heavens, 
if you could only know what horrors I 've had of that ! 
For a long time I drank black coffee to keep me 
awake. But now, even if I said anything about 
Dolores, Dick would just think that I had eaten 
something that did n't agree with me. Is n't it funny, 
Doris, but Dick is convinced that she belongs to Mr. 
Roderick. 

DORIS 

Roddy ? How ? Who ? Just what do you mean ? 

CHLOE 

Don't get peevish about it, but Dick cannot see why 
Mr. Roderick, when he had not been married quite a 
year, should send to America for a perfectly strange 
child to adopt. Of course, it does look queer. 
DORIS (angry and haughty) 

How ungrateful you are, Chloe! You might talk 
him out of that, at least. You 're lucky enough not 
to have him find out about you and that tenor — 
and because Roddy is so noble and thinks that she 's 



ACT ii] PAPA 39 

my child, and brings her here where you can be with 
her every moment, he gets suspected! Will you 
please tell me who is supposed to be her mother? 
CHLOE {equally angry and haughty) 

I 'm sure it is n't my fault, Doris. I did n't tell Mr. 
Roderick she was your child. You did it yourself — 
and I can't help it, can I, if Dick thinks that her 
mother must have been one of Mr. Roderick's 
protegees? He was always finding them on the East 
Side and doing things for them — and Dolores is 
dark. ' 

DO£IS 

You might, at least, have picked out an American 
tenor, or an English — or even a German — to lose 
your head about! I will not have people thinking 
that my husband had an affair with some — some 
ignorant immigrant! 

CHLOE 

I 'm sure that I can't go back and do it all over 
again now. . . . Anyway, the greatest tenors are 
always Italians. 

[Papa enters, younger and more blithe than ever. 
His amiable and charming presence ends the family 
quarrel. Both daughters rise and greet him with a 
kiss, and all three move to a sofa, where they sit, 
affectionately grouped. Papa is dressed entirely in 
white. He looks beautiful and benign. 

PAPA 

Ah, daughters I 
DORIS AND CHLOE (speaMng together) 

Oh, Papa, dear! . . . Oh, Papa, darling! 

DORIS 

Did you have a good time, dear? 



40 PAPA [act II 

CHLOE 

You are n't tired, are you, dear? 

DORIS 

Did jou win or lose, dear? 

CHLOE 

How much, dear? 

PAPA 

The goddess of luck smiled on me, my angels: it is 
almost three thousand. (He shows them the money) 

DORIS 

You 're a perfect wonder, darling ! I 'm proud of 
you. 

CHLOE 

You are certainly a shark, Papa. Who else was at 
the Casino? 
PAPA {suddenly puts the money away and stares into 
space with a look of profoumd sadness) That bounder, 
Witchmere. 

DORIS AND CHI.OE 

Oh, really ! ... Not really ! 

DORIS 

Did he dare to be rude to you? 

CHLOE 

What did he do? 

PAPA 

He avoided me. He only nodded. 

DORIS 

And you had n't seen each other for months ? 

CHLOE 

I simply can't understand it! 

DORIS 

Do you owe him anything, dear? 



ACT ii] PAPA 41 

PAPA 

No, my darling. I 've been particularly careful never 
to have any business transactions with him. He 
never has liked me. 

DORIS 

He 's been jealous of you! 

CHLOE 

Georgia Witchmere is such a fright that she hates / 
everybody. She may have brains, but who cares 
anything about brains.'^ 
PAPA {repeating) 

Witchmere 's a bounder ! 

DORIS 

He pretends to be so fearfully high-brow. He makes 
himself conspicuous by being at the opera before the 
curtain goes up, and collects something or other 
that 's utterly uninteresting. But he goes on his 
knees to Roddy, all right. You ought to have cut / 
him, Papa, yourself — now that I'm married to 
Roddy. 

PAPA 

I meant to, really — but he had such charming 
people with him. 
CHLOE AND DORIS {together) 
Who.? 

PAPA 

The young Earl and the Countess of Hemmingway. 
The Countess is perfectly' exquisite. 

CHLOE AND DORIS 

Oh! 

DORIS 

Don't we know someone else who knows them.? 



42 PAPA [act II 

CHLOE 

Not a soul here — but I 've heard a lot about her. 

PAPA 

They both looked bored to death by Witchmere. 

DORIS 

They are really our kind, you know. She 's got all 
sorts of go. . . . Roddy 's got to get them here. 
That would fix the Witchmeres, wouldn't it, darling? 
PAPA (beaming) 

Perfectly, my angel. Think of Witchmere trying 
to snub me! It is amusing! Of course I shall have 
to treat him charmingly to show that I did n't notice 
it. 

CHLOE 

Did you meet anyone else, dear.? 

PAPA 

Oh, that reminds me! Something quite distressing 
has occurred. 

CHLOE AND DORIS 

What, dear Papa.J^ 

PAPA 

That man is here ! 

CHLOE AND DORIS 

Which man.'* 

PAPA 

Zimzapanzi ! 

CHLOE 

My Zimzapanzi, Papa? 
DORIS (speaking at the same time) 
Chloe's Zimzapanzi, Papa? 

PAPA 

He 's at the hotel, and a very great lion, my darlings. 
But he is charming. I was introduced to him yes- 



ACT ii] PAPA 43 

terday. I did n't mention it to you, but I saw him 
again to-day. 

DORIS 

Good heavens ! Suppose we meet him. 

CHLOE 

Oh, what shall I do? 

PAPA 

I thought of that. It quite haunted me last night. 
So to-day I went over and had a talk with him. 

DORIS 

What did you tell him? 

CHLOE 

What did he say? 

PAPA 

I told him all — about little Dolores, and Chloe's 
marriage to Dick, and Doris — everything. He was 
profoundly touched, my dears. 

CHLOE 

Does he love me still? 

DORIS 

Do you think we shall run into him? 

PAPA 

I explained the difficulties. He will be sure to help 
us avoid any embarrassing situations. He still cher- 
ishes the memory of Chloe, and apologized to me most 
abjectly. It was very wise, I think, to have this 
understanding with him. 

\_Leopold enters with the tea things. He arranges 
the table, 

DORIS 

Tell them, Leopold. (The servant bows and goes 
out) You shall have tea, darling, at once. (She 
busies herself at the table) Chloe, too. She 's begun 



44 PAPA [act II 

to moon. Now, whatever happens, Chloe, be a sport 
and don't look as if a ghost were hanging around. 
CHLOE (^bracing up a little) 

Don't worry about me, Doris. Is — is he any stouter, 
Papa ? 

PAPA 

He 's robust — quite robust — but not — not un- 
usually so — for a tenor. 
DORIS (busy making the tea) 

Oh yes. Papa, I wanted to ask you what you think 
of my attitude toward little Dolores. Is it right? 

PAPA 

Quite perfect, my darling. 

CHLOE 

Ah, if you could only know how hard it is for me ! 

DORIS 

Well, I 'm the one that has the difficult time — being 
as soft as Roddy expects. I 'm not a bit that way 
myself, but he is so happy about restoring her to 
me that I have to keep on acting like a long-lost 
mother — 

CHLOE (^interrupting, as if making a point) 

Mr. Roderick certainly does act like a long-lost 
father. You '11 admit that, at least. 

DORIS (icily) 

That is because he has so much magnanimity. 
[Mr. Roderick and Dick enter. Mr. Roderick is as 
noticeably spic-and-span as ever, and Dick as ultra- 
fashionable in his fastidious fashion. There are ex- 
clamations in chorus as the five of them spread them- 
selves comfortably about, indolently and gracefully. 
Mr. Roderick, of course, waits near Doris, in order 



ACT ii] PAPA 45 

to make himself useful. Tommy, the English Bull, 
follows and conducts himself with charm and taste, 

DORIS 

Roddy, dear, here 's Chloe's cup. 

[Mr. Roderick does what is required in very perfect 

fashion. 

DORIS 

Rum or cream, to-day, Papa.? 

PAPA 

Cream, dearest, thank you. 

DORIS 

How about it, Dick? 

CHLOE 

I long for a sandwich. 

DORIS 

Roddy, the sandwiches. 

\CMoe is quickly satisfied by the alert Mr, Roderick, 

DICK 

Rum for me, Doris. 

DORIS 

Here you are. 

[^Dick secures his own cup as Papa is peering side- 
ways at two sandwiches to see which he prefers. It 
is finally decided by his taking two. Dick, on his 
way to his chair, secures a sandwich for hvmself; 
and now Mr. Roderick, after fussing with the lamp 
for Doris, relaxes sufficiently to take the cup that 
she has fixed for him. 

PAPA 

Here, Tommy : beg ! 

[Tommy, having begged nicely, is allowed to share 

Papa's sandwich. 



46 PAPA [act II 

MR. RODERICK 

Will you have anything else, my dear? 

DORIS 

A sandwich. Where are they.f* 
[ilf r. Roderick passes them, 

DORIS 

Thanks. 

CHLOE 

Here, Tommy. 

[Tommy goes toward her to beg for more, 

MR. RODERICK 

Suppose we have little Dolores down.^* Shall we? 

PAPA 

Ah yes, where is our little angel? 

DORIS 

Ring, Roddy. 

[Mr. Roderick rings, 

CHLOE 

Papa says the Witchmeres are at the hotel, Dick. 
[The hutler appears, 

DORIS 

Send Mile. Dolores, Leopold. 
[The hutler hows and disappears, 

DICK 

Are they coming over? 

DORIS 

Don't anybody ask them here! I don't want them! 

PAPA 

But why, my dear? 
DORIS {petulantly) 

All of them get on my nerves, frightfully: thoy 
always did. 



ACT ii] PAPA 47 

MR, RODERICK (sOOthiniffll/) 

Then thej can't come. I '11 avoid asking them. 
^Little Dolores enters, followed hy her governess. 
The child is dark and thm, with much dignity and 
very accurate manners. Her clothes are 'picturesque 
cmd jascinatvng. As she Trvakes her little courtesy 
and runs to Doris, waiting for the others to stop 
speaking, she is really quite wonderful. Her ease 
is astonishing. The governess, a French woman, pre- 
cise, dignified, and with a startlingly interesting face, 
waits near the door, following Dolores^ conduct with 
careful eyes. Contempt, indifference, and a super- 
ficial respect are all in her attitude, 
PAPA AND CHLOE {speaking together) 
Ah! The angel! The darling! 

MR. RODERICK AND DORIS (following cloSCly) 

The dear child ! — My little one ! 

DICK (lagging a little with his comment) 
Cutie ! 

DOLORES (as if unconscious that she has been men- 
tioned) Bon j our, Maman ! (She lifts her face for a 
kiss, while her entire audience is breathlessly watch- 
ing her) 

DORIS (kissing her with elaborate affection) 
D'ou viens tu, ma cherie.? 

DOLORES 

Je viens de manger mon petit souper avec Made- 
moiselle, Maman. (Another courtesy, and she is off 
to Mr, Roderick, bobbing to him) Bon jour, Papa. 

MR. RODERICK 

Bon jour, ma petite. 

IHe kisses her, and then lifts her high in the air by 



48 PAPA [act II 

way of being entertaining. Even at this lack of tact 
Dolores does not lose her self-possession. When she 
is replaced on the floor, she courtesies again and rims 
to Chloe'. 

DOLORES 

Bon jour, ma tante. 

[Chloe interrupts speech and hows with an emotional 

embrace that Dolores finds distinctly trying. 

CHLOE 

Ah — my darling little Dolores! Do you love me? 
DOLORES {^prettily and almost successfully hiding a 
yawn as she answers in a bored tone of voice) Oui, 
oui, tante Chloe. (She bobs instantly and is off to 
Papa, who rises to receive her; they enjoy one an- 
other, obviously, and Dolores drops her very best 
courtesy) Bon jour, Grand-papa. 
[Papa kisses her hand, and then both her cheeks, 

PAPA 

Bon jour, mon ange. 
DOLORES (se^eing Tommy lurking enmously near) 
O, le chien, le chien ! 

PAPA 

Come here, Tommy. {He drags Tommy by the col- 
lar imto Dolores^ proximity and invites her to pat 
Tommy on the head; then encouragingly and pre- 
cisely) Mets ta petite main sur la tete du bon chien, 
ma cherie. 

[Dolores obeys by resting her little hand delicately 
on the head of the good dog. Tommy behaves beau- 
tifully. Everyone regards them attentively. Doris 
lights a cigarette. 

DOLORES 

Merci, Grandpapa. Bon jour. Tommy. 



ACT ii] PAPA 49 

PAPA (to the governess) 

May I invite Dolores to share my sandwich, Made- 
moiselle ? 

THE GOVERNESS (in occented English mixed with 
French) Pardonnez, mais non, M'sieu. She has had 
her supper and a bon-bon. Ca sufBt. 
[Dolores is unconcerned. She leaves Tonwiy and 
Papa reluctantly, to run to Dick, 

DOLORES (^bobbing perfunctorily) 
Bon jour, oncle Dick. 

DICK (tricing to patronize her) 
Hello, kiddie. 

[Dolores turns her face up to be kissed in spite of 
these barbaric manners, and after Dick has given the 
kiss she makes still another courtesy and runs to 
Mademoiselle, who is waiting with one hand out- 
stretched as a hint that they must go. Dolores takes 
the hand, then releases it to Tnake her farewell cour- 
tesy after she has spoken. 

DOLORES 

Bonne nuit, Maman; bonne nuit, Papa; bonne nuit, 
tante Chloe; bonne nuit, Grand-papa; bonne nuit, 
oncle Dick. 
ALL (in chorus) 

Bonne nuit, ma cherie! . . . Ma petite! . . . etc. 
[Dolores is about to go. Suddenly she remembers 
something and clasps her hands. 

DOLORES 

O, la priere ! la priere ! 

[A second of silence answers. Doris holds out her 

arms. 



J( 



50 PAPA [act n 

DORIS 

Viens t'a genouiller ici, mon ange. 
\_Dolores runs to Doris and kneels prettily; she bows 
her head and clasps her hands and makes an exquisite 
and touching figure as she goes through her little 
French prayer. Everyone about her watches her 
intently and everyone is fixed in an attitude of abso- 
lute silence, with fingers to lips in a warning to each 
other to be attentive. Papa is positively reverent, 
and Chloe seems about to yield to her emotion. Doris 
herself looks sweet and lovely, as she sits with her 
eyes downcast above the kneelimg child, one hand on 
Dolores' head, the other, with the cigarette between 
the fingers, held off in the air in an attentive gesture. 
The atmosphere relaxes when the prayer is finished, 
and Dolores arises, 

DOLORES 

Bonne nuit, Maman! 

[Dolores does not think it necessary to address all 

the others, but runs again to Mademoiselle, who bows 

slightly and takes the child's hand. Then they are 

gone, 

PAPA 

The little angel! 

CHLOE 

The darling! 
DORIS (^dutifully) 
My adorable baby ! 

PAPA 

It is positively touching to see a pure little child say- 
ing its evening prayer. 

DICK 

How about some bridge before dinner? 



ACT II ] PAPA 51 

PAPA (delighted) 

I 'm just in the mood. (To Doris and Chloe) Who 

will play? 
CHLOE ( tranquil again) 

I '11 take a hand. 

DICK 

How about it, Doris.? 

DORIS 

No, thanks. 

[The others all look toward Mr. Roderick. 

ME. KODERICK 

You don't need me, do you ? If you don't mind play- 
ing with the dummy, I '11 stay out. 

PAPA 

Are we expecting any guests for dinner, dear? 

DORIS 

No, dear, but we '11 motor to the Casino later, 

perhaps. 

[Chloe and Dick follow Papa into another room. 

DORIS 

More tea, Roddy, dear? 
MR. RODERICK (shakcs his head) 

No, my dear. 
DORIS (holding out a cigarette case) 

A cigarette, dear? 

MR. RODERICK 

No, my dear. 

DORIS 

Got a headache? (She ruffles his hair) 

MR. RODERICK 

No, my dear. 

DORIS 

Worried? What about? 



52 PAPA [act II 

MR. RODERICK 

Are you happy, Doris? 

DORIS 

Oh, yes, Roddy: perfectly. 

MR. RODERICK 

Have I done all that you dreamed and hoped about 
little Dolores.? 

DORIS 

You have been simply splendid. You have shown the 
greatest magnanimity. Papa said so himself. 

MR. RODERICK 

Well, I want to do still more: to bring myself to 

show a greater magnanimity! 
DORIS (^amazed) 

What — what could you possibly do? 
MR. RODERICK {slowly. With emotionol emphasis) 

Permit Dolores' father — her real father — to see 

his child! 
DORIS {appalled) 

That — that man ! 

MR. RODERICK 

I have given the subject much thought. I have said 
to myself that, after all, Zimzapanzi is a great tenor : 
artists have certain prerogatives — great artists, I 
mean. His mistake about you was unpardonable in 
every way, but doubtless he did not know who you 
were. He confused you with a different type of per- 
son. We must not forget that he is a foreigner. 

DORIS 

Yes, I forgave him: Papa forgave him: Chloe for- 
gave him : but we all feel — we all consider him 
quite, quite impossible, socially. 



ACT ii] PAPA 53 

MR. RODERICK 

But surely the situation is more difficult for me than 
for anyone else — 
DORIS (interrupting) 

But there is n't any situation that I can see. 

MR. RODERICK 

My darling, be brave ! Zimzapanzi is here ! 
DORIS (acting her best and pretending amazement) 
Here? 

MR. RODERICK 

At the inn. Yesterday he picked me up when one 
of my tires got a puncture and took me on to the 
Casino in his machine. I did n't know who he was 
until we had lunched together, though I discovered 
him at once to be a man of great distinction, my 
dear, and charm. 

DORIS 

Oh, Roddy, you don't want to bring him back into 
my life, do you? (She seems alarmed) 

MR. RODERICK 

He is with some charming people — the Earl of 
Hemmingway, and the Countess. 
DORIS (interested in this delightful news) 

But Roddy — do you think we could have them here ? 
Zimzapanzi, I mean. 

ME. RODERICK 

If I can endure it, and you can endure it, we must 
— for the sake of Little Dolores ! It is his right, 
Doris ! 

DORIS 

Have you — asked — him — ? 

MR. RODERICK 

I went over to-day. I told him all. 



54 PAPA [act II 

DORIS 

What did he say? 

MR. RODERICK 

Very little. . . . He wrung my hand. . . . He un- 
derstands. . . . He thanked me for — for — every- 
thing — particularly for speaking. 
DORIS (rising and becoming animated with the spirit of 
this adventure) You are right ! We '11 introduce 
them. Oh, Roddy, dear, you are so noble! 

MR. RODERICK 

My darling! {He embraces her tenderly) But what- 
ever your memories — you will — you will not — .? 
He is fascinating, my darling! 

DORIS 

Now, Roddy, don't worry about that. I could not 
love anybody but you. I am really not at all senti- 
mental about my — past. Only seeing him will be 
difficult. 

MR. RODERICK 

I understand perfectly. But I shall not leave you to 

bear the strain alone: the child and I will help you 

through the first meeting. 

[Leopold appears with a card on a tray, Doris takes 

it: her eyes and Mr, Roderick's meet and both 

thrill with the consciousness that this is a dramatic 

situation, 

DORIS 

It is — he I 

MR. RODERICK 

Ask the Signor to wait, Leopold. {The servant bows 
and goes out; Mr. Roderick turns to Boris) Now, 
my darling, be brave ! I did not think that he would 



ACT ii] PAPA 55 

come so soon, but doubtless the thought of Little 
Dolores haunted him. I will go, myself, and bring 
her to you. Wait here. 

\^He leads her to a chair and indicates that she is to 
sit down. He places her, just so, and turns the chair 
at an effective angle: then, on tiptoe, as if he were 
at a funeral, he leaves the room. As soon as he is 
gone, she springs from her chair and to the other 
doorway. Her voice, as she calls, keeping an eye 
out for Mr. Roderick's return, is a tense stage- 
whisper, 

DORIS 

Papa ! I want you — just a second ! 
[Doris scampers hack to her chair and takes care to 
arrange herself just as Mr. Roderick left her. Papa 
enters, his cards in his hand, excitement amd alarm 
vn his face. 

PAPA 

My angel, what is it? 
DORIS {takes on the air of a guilty conspirator as she 
leans toward him and speaks in a tense voice) It 's 
that man. Papa — Zimzapanzi : he 's here ! I can't 
explain — but Roddy thought he ought to meet 
Dolores, and got him over from the hotel. It 's a 
good thing that you told him that Roddy thinks 
she 's my child, so he won't think Chloe is Roddy's 
wife — and spoil everything. You 're sure he got 
that straight.? 

PAPA 

Yes, my darling. He was very much touched by your 
nobility in assuming your sister's mistake. He said 
that such unselfishness was very rare. 
[Chloe enters with her cards still in her hand. 



56 PAPA [act II 

DORIS (^rising excitedly) 

Good heavens ! What do you want, Chloe ? 

CHLOE 

I saw him come! Where is he? 

DORIS 

S'sh : here 's Roddy ! 

[The three are grouped like conspirators when 
through the doorway suddenly enter Mr. Roderick 
and Zimzapanzi, with Little Dolores between them. 
They enter in absolute and beautiful silence. Little 
Dolores wears a pink dressing gown to her ankles^ and 
on her feet are pink knitted bedroom slippers with 
wide pink bows on them. Mr. Roderick, Dolores and 
Zimzapanzi form a group directly facing Doris, Papa 
and Chloe. There is am intense long pause. In fact, 
the pause is too long. Zimzapanzi, who is fat and 
obviously a child of Italy and a person of tempera- 
ment, stares from Doris to Chloe hopelessly. His 
eyes are blank. He feels that something is required 
of him, but he has a poor memory for faces. Papa 
feels that someone ought to say something. 
PAPA (bowing) 

Ah, Signor Zimzapanzi! How delightful to have 
this pleasure. 

[Zimzapanzi bows low in response — but his eyes are 
blank as he still looks hopelessly out of the corner 
of his eyes, first at Doris, then at Chloe, then at Mr. 
Roderick. He is almost praying for someone to help 
him. Neither Papa nor Mr. Roderick quite know 
what is the matter. They take his silenee for fitting 
emotion, but begin to feel there has been enough. 
They expect something different. Suddenly, as the 



ACT ii] PAPA 57 

pause is exquisitely embarrassing and 'painful, little 
Dolores runs toward Doris, 

DOLORES 

Maman ! Maman ! 

[Zimzapanzi recovers Ms poise at once. Doris seats 
herself again in the effective attitude in which Mr, 
Roderick had placed her. She opens her arms to 
Dolores and lifts her upon her lap, 

DORIS 

Viens ici, ma petite. 

\_Now that Doris and Dolores are adjusted and Zim- 
zapanzi is sure of his grovmd, he advances toward 
them with operatic ease, 

PAPA 

You '11 pardon us ? We are at bridge. 
[Mr, Roderick nods, Doris nods, Zimzapanzi nods, 
but no one replies. Chloe gives one stormy look 
toward Zimzapanzi and rushes out. Papa follows, 
Mr, Roderick takes a chair at the back of the room. 
Zimzapanzi feels that his way is clear, and he begins 
a performance calculated to charm his host as well 
as his hostess. He drops on one! fat knee with aston- 
ishing ease. His voice is deep and glorious, his Eng- 
lish almost perfect. His exclamation is full of feeling. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Ah ! You ! ( Taking her hand he kisses it rever- 
ently) And our little one! 

[He" regards Dolores^ little dark face with undeniably 
genuine interest and affection. Doris finds him a 
worthy collaborator. She proceeds to act her part 
with much enjoyment and confidence — keeping an 
eye on Mr. Roderick for effect. 



58 PAPA [act II 

DORIS 

You — you remember me ? 

\_Her voice is sweet and Zimzapanzi does not fail her. 

His answer is full of beauty and pathos, 

ZIMZAPANZI 

As I remember few things in my life, Madame! 

DORIS 

Sit there, won't you, near us? 

\_She indicates a large chair. Zimzapanzi rises from 
his knees and brings this chair still closer to her own. 
He seats himself and waits. There is a brief pause. 
DORIS (referring to the child in her arms) 

This is your — this is our — daughter. Little Do- 
lores. Is n't she sweet? I think she is very much 
like you. Don't you? 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Let me look at her. 

[Dolores is pushed by Doris into an upright position: 

she regards the stranger with polite curiosity, 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Yes, yes, she is like me. But she is more like my 
sister Teresa. One would notice the resemblance 
at once. 

DORIS 

Have you any other children? {There is the briefest 
pause) Oh, I beg your pardon! Roddy, dear, 
Dolores is like the Signor, is n't she? 

MR. RODERICK 

Quite, quite; yes, quite. 
[Another slight pause, 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Would she — come to me, you think? 



ACT ii] PAPA 59 

DORIS (with an inspiration) 

You shall be her uncle! Cherie, do you see the new 
uncle? Will you not go and speak to him? He is 
a good uncle and loves you very much. Vas 
I'embrasser. 

DOLORES 

Oui, oui, Maman. (She slides from Doris^ arms, 
courtesies to the guest, and holds up her face to be 
kissed) Bon Jour, mon oncle. 

\_The emotional Zimzapanzi sweeps the child into his 
arms, kissing her and murmuring Italian words to her 
in his splendid voice, Dolores likes him at once. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Ah — pretty baby — mea cara ! Com' e carina ! 
J^Dolor^s is impressed and even puts her arms about 
his neck. Doris is delighted. 

DORIS 

Oh, you are simply splendid ! Roddy, is n't he splen- 
did? He does love the child, and she loves him! You 
were right. Is n't my husband the noblest man in 
the world, Signor? 
ZIMZAPANZI (a little surprised) 

Yes, Madame, M'sieur is most generous. I — can- 
not quite understand such magnificence of the heart. 
This is a profound — a great joy — you may be- 
lieve — for me ! 

DORIS 

You shall come and see her every day ! Can't he, 
Roddy? You are stopping for some time at the 
hotel? 

ZIMZAPANZI 

For a month, Madame; then I must go to London. 



60 PAPA [act II 

DORIS 

Roddy says you are with friends? 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Yes, Madame ; I should so like that you might know 

them. 

\_Papa enters again. It is plain that he could not 

keep away, 

DORIS 

Papa, dear, you 've no idea how perfect it has been 
to see them together ! The Signor adores Dolores ! 
And she adores him! 
PAPA {advancing toward the group and speaking to 
Dolores) Who is this, darling? 

DOLORES 

Mon cher oncle. (Dolores slips from Zimzapanzi^s 
arms at this, kisses Papa, and then curls herself up in 
a chair; she soon goes to sleep) 

DORIS 

I thought she 'd better call him " uncle " ; it is much 
simpler. 

MR. RODERICK 

Quite right. 

\_Mr. Roderick has left his seat, and he and Papa are 
now standing near Doris. 

PAPA 

Quite tactful of you, my darling. 

DORIS 

Signor Zimzapanzi is coming every day to see her, 
until he goes to London, and he has some friends he 
wants us to meet. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

The Earl and the Countess of Hemmingway: they 
are what you call in America " good sports." 



ACT ii] PAPA 61 

PAPA 

That will be delightful. 

ziMZAPANZi {rising and turning to Mr, Roderick) 
I do not know quite how — to — say my thanks : 
especially to you, M'sieur. (He bows to Mr. Rod- 
erick) 

MR. RODERICK {beaming with his nobility) 

Say nothing, I beg of you: I have done only what 
— what was right, what was just. Your attitude has 
firmly convinced me that I have made no mistake. 
Perhaps you will dine with us.^^ 

ZIMZAPANZI 

I have engaged my friends to dine with me. It is 
unfortunate. Perhaps we might meet later.'' 

PAPA 

That would be delightful. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

And still later, supper. I will sing ! 

DORIS 

How perfect ! 
ZIMZAPANZI {to Doris) 

You have friends with you? 

DORIS 

There will be five of us. 
ZIMZAPANZI ( to Papa and Mr, Roderick) 

It is arranged. And now, au revoir. We shall meet 
to-night. {He bows over Doris^ hand with profound 
reverence) Au revoir, Madame. 
[Doris rings the bell as Zimzapanzi moves away and 
stops by the chair in which Dolores has gone to sleep. 
He stoops and kisses her, speaking in a low voice 
without awaking her. 



62 PAPA [act II 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Buona notte, mea cara! (Now he turns to Mr. 
Roderick) Again, M'sieur, I thank you. 
{^Leopold has appeared and Zimzapanzi makes a good 
exit. There is a slight pause , then Papa speaks 
blithely. 

PAPA 

Perfectly charming, is n't he ? 

MR. RODERICK 

Great distinction and understanding. 
[^Dick and Chloe enter; he is peevish, 

DICK 

When you play bridge, you 've got to play bridge. 

CHLOE 

I know, Dick, but I had the fidgets. 

PAPA 

You must pardon me, my dear boy. Bridge should 
not be attempted at such a time. It is a thing not 
to be taken lightly and given only one's odd moments. 

DORIS 

Well, it 's time to dress for dinner now, anyway. 
Signor Zimzapanzi has asked us to supper, Chloe. 
The Hemmingways are to be there, so look spiffyr 

DICK 

Earl of Hemmingway? I 'd like to know why people 
like that take up with opera-singers and artists and 
people like that? 

DORIS 

What would you wear, Chloe: that yellow thing, or 
the little mauve from Lucille. It always makes a hit. 
. . . The Witchmeres are sure to see us. 

CHLOE 

The mauve, I think. . . . I 'd better put on my green 



ACT ii] PAPA 63 

one, with the silver do-jiggers. . . . No, I shall wear 
that simple white chiffon, with the pink rosebuds. 

PAPA 

You look exactly like a debutante in it, my dear. Do 
you remember one, almost like it, that you had in 
your first season? 
CHLOE {impassively, and with a far-off look) 
I was just thinking of it. 

DORIS 

Where are we to meet them, Roddy? 

MR. RODERICK 

I don't think he said, my dear. I '11 see if I can catch 
him, and ask him. (He goes out through the terrace, 
in a hurry) 
PAPA {generously, as he goes out through curtained 
doorway) Now, my darling daughters, be very nice, 
for my sake, to the Witchmeres. 

DORIS 

Yes, Papa. Come on, Chloe. 

CHLOE 

In a moment. 

[Doris follows Papa out, 

DICK 

Come on, Chloe. 

CHLOE 

In a moment, Dick. Don't wait. 
[Dick follows Doris out. Chloe, left alone, stands 
beside Dolores' chair and looks down at the sleeping 
child. Her attitude is tender and romantic. Zimza- 
panzi reenters, 
ziMZAPANZi {coming through the curtained doorway and 
stopping hesitantly as he speaks) Pardon me — we 



64 PAPA [act II 

were not introduced, I believe. (Chloe turns to him; 
he is explanatory and untroubled) But I returned 
to say that I shall await my guests at the hotel. 
We shall go to the Casino together. You will tell 
the others? 

CHLOE 

Yes. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Your face is a little familiar, Madame. I trust that 
you are coming, too. {There is a little pause; he 
speaks with charm) Have we ever met before.'' 

CHLOE 

It was a long time ago. {Her tone is cold and half- 
tragic; involuntarily she glances at Dolores) 

ZIMZAPANZI 

You are — ? Forgive me! I — I remember now, 
I did not understand from your father that you, too, 
were here. Yes, yes, I remember! {His tone is un- 
certain, but contrite) 

CHLOE 

No, you don't. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

But I — I am almost remembering. Forgive me ! I 
— I — one has so much to remember in my pro- 
fession, Madame. You do forgive me? 

CHLOE 

I forgave you — everything, even this — the first 
time that I heard you sing — afterwards. 
ZIMZAPANZI {eagerly) 
What was my role? 

CHLOE 

I — I — I — don't remember exactly, now. 



ACT ii] PAPA 65 

ziMZAPANZi (wounded and angry am,d childish) 

Indeed! How is that possible, if it meant so much 
to you? 

CHLOE (formal again, ignoring his question) 

Atid now, au revoir. You can go this way. Mr. 
Roderick is looking for you, but I will give him the 
message if you miss him. (She points the way through 
the French windows across the terrace) Follow that 
walk. Your motor is around that curve. 

ZIMZAPANZI 

Au revoir. ... I — I am not a bad fellow, Madame. 
[He lifts her hand to his lips, kisses it apologetically, 
hows and goes out. She watches him a second, shrugs 
her shoulders and goes out through the curtained 
doorway. A brief pause. Leopold appears, straight- 
ens a chair or two, sees Dolores and removes her — 
as the curtain falls. 

CURTAIN 



THE THIRD ACT 
PAPA'S FUTURE 



PERSONS 

Doris 

Chloe 

Papa 

Mr. Roderick 

Dick 

Mrs. Blythe 

A Maid 



THE THIRD ACT 

Seven or eight months have passed, and the Spring 
is approaching in London. Doris and Chloe, in a sit- 
ting-room of their complicated suite at the Ritz-Carlton, 
are trying to think of something that they might do at 
this early hour of half -past eleven in the mjorning. 
They are distinctly bored. Chloe puts aside he'r maga- 
zine and turns to Doris, who is playing solitaire at a 
table. 

CHLOE 

How stupid everything is ! 

DORIS 

London is a wretched place to shop, too. (She plays 
her last card and sweeps them all back into the 
deck; this she puts in its place in a rack on the table) 

CHLOE 

I don't even feel like buying anything. 

DORIS 

What is the matter with everybody? 

CHLOE 

You 'd better ask what is the matter with Papa. 
Anyone with half an eye can see that something 's 
wrong. 

DORIS 

It 's the weather. I '11 get Roddy to take us to the 
Riviera. Papa needs a change. 

CHLOE 

He has had a beautiful time here. 



70 PAPA [act III 

DORIS 

Everyone is simply mad about him. 

CHLOE 

He goes everywhere and knows everybody. 

DORIS 

The Princess adored him. She told him all her chil- 
dren's ages, and all the funny things that they had 
said since they could talk. 

CHLOE 

And the prince said he 'd never tasted anything like 
the cocktails that Papa is onto. 

DORIS 

Even Mrs. Blythe said that she could n't see why he 
was n't an Ambassador. 

CHLOE 

And the other night at the opera Constantina Tretore 
kept half of the Peerage waiting while Papa was 
congratulating her after the second act. She says 
he is the keenest critic she has. 

DORIS 

You know it was quite fortunate, in a way, that 
Roddy raked up Zimzapanzi, was n't it? 

CHLOE 

You know perfectly well how I feel about that, Doris. 
Why mention it? 

DORIS 

Well, it was n't Roddy's fault that Zimzapanzi did n't 
remember you, Chloe. But you 're never grateful for 
anything. 

CHLOE 

Why should I be grateful for having my past re- 
called ? 



ACT III] PAPA 71 

DORIS 

You 're always recalling it yourself. You 've filled 
three diaries on the strength of that one affair, you 
know. 

CHLOE 

Be that as it may, Doris — think of what I had to 
suffer in humiliation, at being forgotten. 

DORIS 

Think of what we all would have suffered if Zimza- 
panzi had made a mistake and picked out the wrong 
one — right before Roddy ! You ought to be grate- 
ful to your dying day that he had the sense to wait 
and find out which one of us was his child's mother 
before he said anything. You 've got to admit that 
he 's been a perfect dear about introducing us to 
people — and about Dolores. He 's simply devoted 
to her. 

CHLOE 

But I shall never consent to Dolores' spending the 
summer with him. I have no idea what sort of per- 
son his wife is — or what sort of children she might 
be allowed to know. 

DORIS 

Oh, they 've been divorced for ages : did n't you know 
that? Mademoiselle would go with Dolores, and if 
Roddy says " yes," you '11 have to be a sport and 
stand for it. 

CHLOE 

It is simply infamous — not having a word to say 
about what happens to one's own child. 

DORIS 

But she 's Zimzapanzi's, too. You can't get around 
that. You '11 have to act just as you would if you 'd 



72 PAPA [act III 

been married and divorced — no matter how much 
you may hate him. 

[Enter Papa — looking excessively English, and 
speaking more so, 

PAPA 

Good morning, daughters ! 

[They run to him, pleased at this diversion, with 
kisses and greetings. 
DORIS AND CHiiOE (^together) 

Good morning, Papa, darhng! {They cling to his 
arms prettily) 

DORIS 

How are you this morning, dear? 

CHLOE 

Did you sleep well, dear? 

DORIS 

Have you had your breakfast, dear ? 

CHLOE 

Are you going out, dear? 

DORIS 

You 're looking well, dear. Do you feel better? 

PAPA 

My darling daughters, I 've come to confess some- 
thing. Let us be seated. 
[They sit in an affectionate group, 

DORIS 

Now, tell us. 

CHLOE 

It can't be anything really naughty. 

DORIS 

What is it all about, dear? 

PAPA 

You won't be vexed with me? 



ACT III] ^ PAPA 73 

DORIS 

Of course not, darling. 

CHLOE 

How simply beautifully that coat fits ! 
DORIS {reproving Chloe with a look) 

Papa is in trouble, Chloe! (To Papa) Now tell us, 
dear. 

PAPA 

It 's about my future ; I — I want to settle down — 
DORIS AND CHLOE {together, with amazement) 
Settle down! 

PAPA 

And get to work — 
DORIS AND CHLOE (together, with horror) 
Work! 

PAPA 

And amount to something — 
DORIS AND CHLOE (^together with utter stupefaction) 
Amount to something! 

PAPA 

Do something ! Be of use ! 
DORIS AND CHLOE (together, feebly) 
Of use! 

PAPA 

To myself ! To my country ! 
CHLOE (with relief) 

To your country! Oh! Is that all? 
DORIS (getting his idea) 

You want to be an Ambassador! Mrs. Blythe has 

been putting it into your head! 

CHLOE 

Which country will you take, dear? 



74 PAPA [act III 

PAPA 

There, there, my darlings ; you have the idea but not 
all — all the details. 

DORIS 

What else? 

CHLOE 

Go on, dear. 

PAPA 

I want — I think I ought — I — how can I express 
it? 
DORIS AND CHLOE {^together, hopefully) 
Money? 

PAPA 

No, my angels — it 's — it 's — getting married ! 
DORIS AND CHLOE {together in absolute astonishnt^ent) 
Getting married! Oh! Oh! Oh! 

CHLOE 

Why, Papa! {She begins to sob and jails into his 
arms) 

DORIS 

Why — why — Papa. {She is angry enough to find 
that she has to fight back the tears; she too is in 
Papa^s arms and he comforts both) 

PAPA 

There — there ! My treasures ! Forgive me ! Don't 
cry! {He begins to cry himself) I — I love you 
more than life itself, my angels ! 

DORIS 

How — how can you think of such a thing. Papa? 

CHLOE 

Are n't we good enough for you? 



ACT III] PAPA 75 

DORIS 

What vile woman has been trying to entangle you, 
dear ? 

CHLOE 

You 're too good, Papa. You 've let some designing 
creature work on your sympathies ! You ought to 
be more careful. 

DORIS 

You have n't gone and asked anybody, yet — have 
you? 

PAPA 

Now — ^ now — now — now! (^He tries to be sooth- 
ing , but both fly up at him) 
CHLOE AND DORIS {together, accusingly) 
Have you. Papa? 
[There is a pause. Papa pulls himself together, 

PAPA 

Forgive me, but — I thought you 'd approve ! 

DORIS 

Who is she? 

CHI.OE 

Yes, who is she? 

PAPA 

Mrs. Blythe. 
CHLOE AND DORIS (together, in quite a different tone) 
Oh! 

PAPA 

You do approve, don't you, my angels? 
CHLOE AND DORIS (delighted) 
Of course. Papa. 

PAPA 

Only — she — she has n't accepted me yet. 



76 PAPA [act III 

DORIS 

What 's wrong? 

CHLOE 

Has she given you hope? 

PAPA 

She — she 's practically said " yes " — but — 

CHLOE 

All sorts of kings have been wild about her, 

DOEIS 

For heaven's sake, Chloe, that is n't the point, now. 
Go on, Papa ; why did she say she hesitated ? 

PAPA 

She thinks I ought to do something — write a great 
book — or be an Ambassador — or buy a newspaper 
— or a string of horses — something. 

DORIS 

Well, you 've got to do it then. We '11 get Roddy 
on the job. Wait a minute. (^She goes into the next 
room) 

CHLOE 

Why on earth would she marry anybody ! 
PAPA {proudly) 

I have reason to think that she cherishes an affection 
for me. 

CHLOE 

Of course ! That must be it ! She 's in love ! 
DORIS {returns) 

I 've sent Louise for Roddy. We '11 have a consulta- 
tion. Where 's Dick ? 

CHLOE 

I '11 have Marguerite find him. {She goes out through 
the door opposite the one Doris used) 



ACT III] PAPA 77 

DORIS (to Papa) 

Now, dear, which thing do you like best — horses or 
newspapers or books or diplomacy? 

PAPA 

That is what I 've been asking myself. 
[Mr. Roderick enters through the door that Doris 
used. At the same instant Chloe brings Dick from 
the opposite room, 

CHLOE 

Here he is ! 

[There are greetings between them all, and a slight 
tendency to talk at once. Presently they are all 
seated about the room in attentive fashion, and Doris 
has the floor, 

DORIS 

Roddy — you and Dick must do some very intelli- 
gent thinking. This is a matter of importance. 
We Ve got to decide on Papa's future. He 's going 
in for a career. 

MR. RODERICK 

A career for Papa? Quite so! 

DICK 

What for? 

MR. RODERICK 

Are you strong enough for that sort of thing? 

DORIS 

Oh, are you strong enough. Papa? 

CHLOE 

Yes, are you, Papa? 

PAPA 

It wouldn't be arduous, would it? We must select 
nothing too arduous. 



78 PAPA [act III 

DICK 

Any sort of career is arduous, and a bore, and a lot 
of work. What 's the idea, anyway ? 

CHLOE 

It will surprise you very much, but — 

DORIS 

But Papa is going to get married! 

MR. RODERICK 

Papa get married.'* 

DICK 

Who 's the girli* 

MR. RODERICK 

Married.'^ Is it advisable.? 

DORIS 

Do hush, Roddy : it 's — Mrs. Blythe ! 

\^DicJc gives a long whistle, eloquent of the fact that 

he is impressed. So is Mr. Roderick. 

MR. RODERICK 

Mrs. Blythe 1 

DORIS 

And she wants him to do something ! 

MR. RODERICK 

Quite so! Of course! Anything in mind.? {He is 
reverential in putting the question to Papa) 

PAPA 

It lies between three or four suggestions of the lady 
herself — racing, buying a newspaper, writing a 
book, or diplomacy. 

CHLOE 

Papa ought to write a book. 

DICK 

That 's easy. Go in for a stable. 



ACT III] PAPA 79 

MR. RODERICK 

They say Wilkins wants to sell his Paris and London 
papers. They 've put him into things over here. 

DORIS 

It is as plain as the nose on a man's face that Papa 
ought to be an Ambassador. Who 's president now.^* 
You fix it up with him, don't you — or with a Secre- 
tary or assistant or something? 

CHLOE 

What I want to know is — which country ? She 
knows everybody, every place, of course! 
[^ knock is heard on the door, 

DORIS 

Come in. 
THE MAID (enters from the private hall) 

Mrs. Blythe is downstairs and wishes to know if Mrs. 
Roderick is at home. 
l^There is an intense pause, 

DORIS 

Tell them to bring her up, at once, Louise. 

THE MAID 

Yes, Madame. 

[The Maid goes out. The pause continues, 

DORIS 

I wonder — what — ? Fancy her coming ! 

PAPA 

I wilj go to my rooms while you receive her. 

DORIS 

I '11 come for you myself, dear, if she asks for you. 
If not, come back accidentally. 

PAPA 

Thank you, my dear. I understand perfectly. 



80 PAPA [act m 

DICK 

I say — why is she willing to marry anyone ? 

DORIS 

Oh, yes, papa, — why is she willing to get married? 
I forgot to ask. 

CHLOE 

She 's in love with papa ! 

MR. RODERICK 

Quite so. . . . Oh, how very flattering! 

PAPA 

Let us hope that my darling Chloe does not ex- 
aggerate. You will excuse me? 

[^With the modest graced of a hero he goes out of the 
door at the hack. Another impressive pause follows, 

DORIS 

Do I look all right, Chloe? 

CHLOE 

Put that hairpin that is coming out, in. Yes — 
you're very attractive. Am I? 

DORIS 

Yes, exceedingly. (Pause) How ugly hotel rooms 
are ! None of one's own pictures — or — 
[There is a ring at a doorhelL A hush falls on 
everybody as Doris and Chloe move toward the door 
and Mr, Roderick and Dick rise and stand waiting. 
Louise opens the door from the little private hall, 
and Mrs. Blythe steps into the room. She is a spec- 
tacular person, though gotten up with the most ele- 
gant and daring ease. Her clothes, draped about her, 
caught here and there in umexpected places, are mar- 
vellous and picturesque. Her hat proclaims sim- 
plicity, but its plumage from Birds of Paradise looks 
priceless. On her breast is a simple aerial cluster of 



ACT III] PAPA 81 

mauve orchids. She is slightly lame, hut instead of 
ignoring the fact she makes it the occasion for carry- 
ing a tall Shepherd's Crook of black enamel, chastely 
decorated with a monogram of diamonds, and with 
casual designs of diamonds set on its handle. She 
is rather tall, very erect, and her face, only inciden- 
tally, is beautiful. To-day she is intimate and charm- 
ing, in a mood to let everyone flatter and pet and love 
her. Nevertheless she is a very grand person as she 
Tnakes her entrance. 
DORIS AND CHLOE {together, with eager and pretty 
courtesy) Mrs. Blythe! How good of you! How 
kind! 

[When Mrs. Blythe is well into the room she looks 
from one to another with wide eyes and a very bright 
steadfast smile. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Are you utterly amazed at my pastoral hour? It 
is n't twelve o'clock yet. I scarcely hoped to find 
anyone at home. It is my good luck. Freddy brings 
me good luck. Freddy is my little Hindoo idol. I 
burn incense to Freddy every night. I 've had him 
ever since I was sixteen, and I 've never had bad 
luck except when I forgot his incense. You don't 
think I 'm silly, do you ? 

CHLOE 

Of course, we don't. 

DORIS 

Do you really believe in him, Mrs. Blythe? 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Well — I don't pray to Freddy ; but I 'd never risk 
offending him, you know. He always gets his in- 
cense if I think of it — and if my maid forgets it, and 



82 PAPA [act m 

anything happens, I always make it a point to dis- 
miss her. As I was saying, Freddy brings me good 
luck: I know he does, even though he has shocked 
several bishops. Has your father gone out? 

DOEIS 

I think not ; may I tell him that you are here, Mrs. 
Blythe? 

CHLOE 

He will feel so slighted if we don't. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

You are very fond of your father, are n't you ? 
CHLOE AND DOEis (together) 
Oh, yes, Mrs. Blythe ! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Yes, tell him. 

DORIS 

Thank you, Mrs. Blythe. (She goes quickly into the 
next room) 

CHLOE 

We saw you at the opera last night. Papa said that 
he would take you our love. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Yes. 

DICK 

I thought it was rather good — the opera, you 
know — for an opera. 
MRS. BLYTHE (languidly) 

I never care much for Tretore — but Zimzapanzi 
sang beautifully. And of course Schoen conducted 
with his most magnificent arm movements. 

DICK 

Yes, I got that ! 



ACT III] PAPA 83 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I 've often longed to conduct an orchestra myself. 
Really, now that I think of it, I believe that I shall ! 
Let me put it down for my secretary to make a note 
of — (She writes on a tiny engagement pad that is 
attached to her gold hag) I might as well as not, 
at something for charity, you know. 

CHLOE 

How clever you are, dear Mrs. Blythe ! 
[Doris comes hack into the room, 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Well, I am clever — and I am not. I don't know 
anything at all about music, but I do know that I 
have good arms and a back. 

PAPA (enters) 

My dear Mrs. Blythe! 

. [Mrs. Blythe's manner suddenly turns into some- 
thing a little shy and youthful, hut very well done. 
She is changing her roles: evidently she likes the 
new one. She gives her hand to Papa, who kisses it. 
Papa has changed his tie and put on white spats. 
She looks at him approvingly. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I am in a mood this morning, my friend. 

PAPA 

How delightful, since it brought you to us ! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

But my moods are like good winds that always blow 
somebody ill. I don't mean to be disastrous — but 
I am. 

PAPA 

We will willingly be your victims, dear lady. 



84. PAPA [act III 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Don't promise too soon: now what do jou think 
this mood made me do? 
DORIS AND CHLOE (together) 
Oh, do tell us ! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I awoke hating everything. Then I thought : " I 
particularly hate that stupid Princess with whom I 
am to have luncheon ! I won't go to her ! " Was n't 
that bad of me ! 

CHLOE 

Good gracious ! But what could you do about it.f^ 

PAPA 

Charming! Perfectly charming! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

You have n't heard the worst. I got the Prince on 
the telephone. I said to him : " I can't come to 
luncheon to-day with Her Highness. I don't want to. 
What shall I do about it.? " 

DORIS 

What did he say.? Was he angry.? 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Angry.? Oh, dear no: he knows what a bore she is, 
and he 's charming : he asked me if I preferred him, 
but when I said " no, not to-day," he said for me to 
go on and do what I liked, and he 'd have her send 
me a note not to come. You see.? Well, then I 
thought that I 'd like to surprise someone. So here 
I am! You see.? 

DORIS 

How perfectly original you are ! 

MR. RODERICK 

I say, quite so! 



ACT III] PAPA 85 

CHLOE 

No wonder people say you 're unusual ! 

DICK 

It 's awfully clever of you, really, to turn 'em down 
when you feel like it. 
PAPA (^indulgently, with unconcealed affection) 

What a child! What a delightful, dear, spoiled 

child! 

[These words go straight to Mrs. Blythe*s heart. 

'She becomes sweet and young as a breath of violets, 

MRS. BLYTHE 

And now you must come and play with me. I feel 
just like playing. 

DORIS 

But dear Mrs. Blythe, suppose Her Highness found 
out? 

CHLOE 

Yes, suppose she did.'' 

DICK 

By jove! 

[Everyone is anxious, 
MRS. BLYTHE (superbly) 

She won't ! And even if she did, I should not care. 
It is no distinction for me to be her friend. She is 
so indiscriminately exclusive. 

DORIS 

Indiscriminately exclusive ! You mean — 

PAPA 

Oh yes ! 

[Everyone realizes by Mrs. Blythe^s manner that 
she has been clever. They applaud her with smiles 
and flattering attitudes. She is ready now for some- 
thing else. She turns to Papa, 



S6 PAPA [act III 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Now what are you going to do with me? 
PAPA (^charmingly, with meaning) 

Keep you — just as long as we can! 
MRS. BLYTHE {evading hut recognizing his intention) 

You 're lunching with somebody.? I will go with you. 

Where.? 

DORIS 

Madame Tretore's. Of course, she 'd love having 
you. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

No — she wouldn't. But I'll go just the same. 
We 're perfectly good-natured enemies. We love 
putting each other out. But I was rather hoping 
that we might go to the country. I 'd love to be 
quaint to-day and stop somewhere and drink milk. 

PAPA 

Could n't I persuade you — ? 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Alone — ! My dear man, 

PAPA 

But dear lady ! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Oh! I remember now why I came! There was a 
reason, too! Read that! (^She finds a letter in her 
hag and gives it to Papa) I don't believe it, of 
course — but this sort of thing is inconvenient. 
[Papa reads the letter and fidgets. There is an 
intense pause. He catches Doris' eye. She realizes 
something is wrong, 

DORIS 

May I — too.? 



ACT III] PAPA 87 

MRS. BliYTHE 

Oh yes, all of you. It is nothing of any consequence ; 
of any deep consequence . . . just unpleasant. 
PAPA (engineering something, as he hands the letter to 
Doris) Dick, my boy — I forgot. Will you do 
something for me? 

\_Papa goes over to Dick, who rises, and speaks in 
a low voice, Dick is obliging. 

DICK 

Of course, right away. {He turns to the others) 
You '11 excuse me? I won't be long. 

PAPA (^explaining) 

It is a very necessary errand. 

[The others simply look wp and accept the incident 
as Dick goes out. The door closes, Doris has given 
the note to Chloe, An intense pause still reigns, 

MRS. BI.YTHE (suddenly) 

Perhaps I should not have concerned myself with a 
family matter — but — (She grows shy) 

CHLOE (reading) 
Good heavens! 

DORIS 

Read it, Roddy ! 
PAPA (to Mrs. Blythe as Mr. Roderick reads the note) 
It was splendid of you, splendid ! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

But as I was saying, my dear friend, only last night 
I definitely decided to marry you — 
PAPA (ecstatically, taking her hand) 
Not — not really and truly ! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Yes — really and truly. I decided we could settle 



88 PAPA [act III 

on a career for you afterwards. In fact, I 'm not 
sure that I want you to have one now ! 

PAPA 

This is too good. I can't believe it! 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I thought you 'd be glad, and I meant to telephone 
quite early — then this note came. Of course, it is 
sheer blackmail — or from somebody who is jealous 
of you. 
PAPA {drooping a little) 

Yes, yes — a rival, no doubt. The cad ! 
[There is a slight pause. Everyone is silent, think- 
ing and perplexed. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

It 's nonsense, really, but I thought I ought to know 
the straight of things. I 'm a woman of the world, 
dear friend. I 'm not provincial. I left America at 
the time of my first marriage. Certainly no one has 
ever called me narrow-minded. I was one of the first 
women of my acquaintance to go in for Socialism. 
I have no intention now of being curious or of blam- 
ing you for some past romance which, everyone in 
London whispers, must have been very romantic and 
beautiful. Your attitude has been all that anyone 
could desire — but I think that the situation ought 
to be explained to me if I am to become your wife. 
I love children. I have often been god-mother. I 
might become attached to this one. But I think I 
ought to know if the mother is living or dead — or 
whether or not she would be likely to take the child 
away just as I got fond of her. You see? Then, 
again, how could I feel as fond of her as I should 
unless I knew what her antecedents were.? You see? 



ACT III] PAPA 89 

DORIS 

But it isn't Papa who adopted her, Mrs. Blythe. 
Roddy and I did it. We mean to keep her always. 
We consider her our child. 

CHLOE 

Mrs. Blythe — you must n't think it is Papa. I — 
I — I must tell the truth at last ! Dolores is my 
child. 

[There is consternation and surprise. Doris and 
Papa, this time, are utterly floored; hut Mr. Rod- 
erick advances with his tale. 

MR. RODERICK 

Do not heed her, Mrs. Blythe. No doubt Chloe 
means well, but she misunderstands your attitude on 
this subject, and is needlessly excited. I see that 
you are concerned, not with her father's past, but 
with the child herself — with her birth as it affects 
her position in this family. Quite right. But let 
me assure you that this note is a lie. The child 
belongs to Doris — my wife ! 
MRS. BLYTHE (bewildered) 
Really? 

MR. RODERICK 

It is entirely true. Before my wife would marry me, 
she told me of this one lamentable incident for which 
no one could possibly blame her — least of all I. 

DORIS 

Roddy was simply wonderful, Mrs. Blythe. He is so 
magnanimous. He adopted Dolores as soon as we 'd 
been married a proper length of time. 

MR. RODERICK 

Doris' father, with the greatest discretion and sym- 
pathy, had watched over and cared for the welfare 



90 PAPA [act III 

of her child until that time. Now little Dolores is 
ours. She will never embarrass you. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Oh, oh ! I see. But — but, on the whole, I think it 
is in better taste to let the rumors remain undis- 
turbed. A young girl, you know — really ! One 
can never quite reconcile such things. It looks as 
though she had not been well brought up. 

MR. RODERICK 

Quite so, and for that reason precisely I am pre- 
pared to assume, by inference, the child's parentage. 
Even my brother-in-law suspects me of some past 
entanglement, 

DORIS 

But Roddy — I don't want people to think that you 
ever cared enough for someone else to adopt her 
child. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

It is often done, my dear, especially in the house- 
holds of the great continental families. (^Her tone 
is a reproof) 

PAPA 

And now, dear lady, that this matter has been set 
straight — ? 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Now, really, I must go. I have decided that I don't 
want to see Tretore to-day. Tretore always talks 
about Tretore — and that bores me. I forgot. 

PAPA 

But suppose that we go to the country instead — 
and drink milk. 
MRS. BLYTHE (relenting a little) 
Could you? 



ACT III] PAPA 91 

DORIS 

Oh yes! We can send Madam Tretore a note. 
Roddy writes beautiful ones. 
PAPA (to Mrs. Blithe) 
Couldn't you? 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I might — if you really want to play with me instead 
of Tretore. 

PAPA 

Of course. 
MRS. BLYTHE (to the otTievs) 

Then run and get ready, and in five minutes I '11 know 
whether I feel like it or not. 

DORIS 

Come, Roddy. You 'd better have Dick paged, 
Chloe. 

CHLOE 

I will. 

[Doris and Mr. Roderick go out through one door, 
Chloe through another. Mrs. Blythe is not quite her- 
self. She seems a little put out with Papa. He feels 
this; his tact is infinite, his charm exquisite. 
PAPA {taking her hand) 

A little cloud has floated across the clear blue sky 
of your soul, my dear. 

[Mrs. Blythe cannot quite resist this, hut she is still 
put out and sulks a little. She evades him, 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I think you 'd better have a career. After all, a man 
ought to have a career or a romance — something 
to distinguish him; in other words, a future or a 
past. 



92 PAPA [act hi 

I'APA 

You have only to suggest what you want me to do. 

MRS..BLYTHE 

Who is the child's other parent, anyway? 

]^APA 

A very famous person, my dear: a great opera 
singer : but — really, I ought not to say more — 
perhaps you can surmise without my speaking. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Why — it really is romantic, is n't it? Quite a fas- 
cinating mystery, in fact! 

\_She seems pleased and muses. Doris and Mr, 
Roderick enter, Doris has on her motor things, 
Mr, Roderick has a note in his hand. 

DORIS 

Read it, Roddy. How's this. Papa? 

MR. RODERICK 

" Dear Madame Tretore : We are great blunderers. 
That we were going to the country to-day certainly 
escaped us when we made our engagement for lunch- 
eon with you. We are sorry — and we hope you 
will be — but we are afraid that you will draw a 
breath of relief. With deep regrets from all," etc. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

She will know that something 's up — it 's so civil. 
[Chloe and Dick enter from the other room, Chloe 
has her motor things on, Dick holds a note, 

DICK {to Papa) 

Here 's a telegram. I found it in the box down- 
stairs. I landed on the clerk for not sending it up. 

CHLOE AND DORIS (together) 

Oh, read it. Papa! What is it, Papa? 



ACT III] PAPA 93 

PAPA {opens the letter, glances through it and reads 
aloud) It's from Madame Tretore. "Don't come! 
I 'm going some place with Zimzapanzi to get mar- 
ried. Read the details in the papers, as I really don't 
know exactly where, when, or how. Fearfully rushed. 
Zimzapanzi says that we must have little Dolores for 
our vacation. Of course, I insist also. Love to the 
little dear. Aifectionately, Tina." 

CHLOE 

Oh! 

DORIS 

How exciting! 

MR. RODERICK 

How satisfactory! 

DICK 

Why is everyone so keen on the kiddie.'^ 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Now are we all ready .^^ 

PAPA 

In just an instant, if you '11 pardon me. {He goes 
out) 

MR. RODERICK 

Just a second. {He too goes out) 

DICK 

In a minute. {He too goes out) 
MRS. BLYTHE {tums to Doris and Chloe) 
Come here, my dears. 
[They go to her. She takes a hand of each. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

You love your father very much, don't you.'^ 

CHLOE 

Of course, Mrs. Blythe. 



94 PAPA [act hi 

DORIS 

He 's the noblest man in the world, Mrs. Blythe. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

You 'd do anything for him? 
DORIS AND CHLOE (together) 
Oh, of course, Mrs. Blythe. 

MRS. BLYTHE 

Will you love me too.^^ 

DORIS 

You're perfectly wonderful, dear Mrs. Blythe! 

CHLOE 

You 're the only woman in the world we 'd let Papa 

marry, Mrs. Blythe! 
MR. RODERICK (enters with his coat orty his stick, gloves 

and hat in his hand) I am ready. 
DICK (enters with his coat on from another direction, 

carrying hat, gloves and stick) Ready. 
PAPA (enters from the rear; he also wears his coat 

and carries his gloves, hat and stick) Now! 

MRS. BLYTHE (tO the OthcTs) 

We will follow you. My motor is waiting. You can 

find it for us. 

[Doris, Chloe, Dick and Mr. Roderick assent in 

chorus and are gone. Papa goes toward Mrs, 

Blythe, 

PAPA 

Now, dear lady.?^ 

MRS. BLYTHE 

I just wanted to tell you, my dear, that I under- 
stand. Your daughters have shown great devotion 
— especially Doris. Her husband evidently believes 
her story. I consider the matter beautifully settled, 
and am quite content to let things stand as they are. 



ACT III] PAPA 95 

You have conducted yourself with great gallantry, 
but I perceive the truth, although I understand that 
you may wish to protest in order to protect her. I 
can be as generous as Zimzapanzi. I cannot blame 
you. Tretore is very beautiful and very good. 
She has been singularly eccentric about her reputa- 
tion. Kings have failed where you succeeded. I 
wonder if the child will have a voice. I prefer my 
engagement ring to be set with a single ruby. I love 
rubies: I always have. 

[Papa perceives that she has thrust him into an un- 
comfortably false position, but, smce that is where 
she wishes hvm to sit, he resolves heroically to do so 
for her sake. He kisses her hand and looks into her 
eyes with the humility of a repentam,t sinner entering 
heaven, 

PAPA 

My darling ! I am a man ! There has been much in 
my life which I ask you to forgive. I — I am not 
worthy of you. Yes, Little Dolores sings very nicely, 
already. I shall trust my son-in-law to find me the 
handsomest ruby in Europe for the most beautiful 
hand in Europe. Mr. Roderick is quite an expert. 
You have made me very proud. Shall we go? 
[Mrs, Blythe takes his arm affectionately and trust- 
fully, as the curtain falls, 

CURTAIN 



DEC 9 1913 



1^ 



CONGRESS 




